A Toon City Christmas Special
by Wormtail96
Summary: Christmas is a hectic time of the year for many people around the world, but for the Toon City gang it is just pure insanity! Read on and find out how they and the other wacky citizens of Toon City celebrate the Yuletide season in their crazy way.
1. Prologue: December 21st

**(A/N) Seasons greetings everyone and welcome to my annual Christmas story. This year, my short story shall be set in the hilarious series of**_** Toon City **_**and the plot a look into the wacky ways the citizens celebrate the holidays. Also, I am slipping in a few mock spoofs of several famous Christmas classics, even that of Charles Dickens' **_**A Christmas Carol. **_**It will have cutaway gags, holiday cheer and the outrageous comedy we've all grown to love from **_**Toon City. **_**So read on and enjoy.**

* * *

**A Toon City Christmas Special**

**Prologue: December 21st**

It was Sunday December 21st 2008, 10:09 pm in the Toontorian capital, Toon City. Snowflakes flew down from the sky wildly coupled by the wind and the city itself was decorated in enough tinsel and light to fit the whole country of Toontoria. This was _the _most profitable time of the year for the city and country. Gifts were being bought and exchanged, the citizens were visiting family and friends and everyone was partying like it was the December 31st 1999. But of course, there was the small portion of citizens that would ensure that the true meaning of the holiday season was kept in others' minds.

In fact, this particular portion of citizens brings us to the beginning of our story. It starts at Toon City's six day long Christmas party in the plaza in front of City Hall...

* * *

"Magnificent." Wormtail96 stood there in front of the large illuminated display of the nativity. The cyborg wizard with a worm-like tail was wearing his open tattered purple trench coat which he wore over his turquoise turtleneck sweater. He also wore his same dark-grey, dirty, patched wizard hat and a red and purple scarf that concealed his face in shadows, except for his pitch-red eyes. "Sheppards, Wise men and the new born saviour. That is the true meaning of Christmas right there."

Wormtail96's cousin Creepie Creecher stood there beside him looking bored. She was wearing her dark blue coat and a set of earmuffs on her head. She breathed out cold air, "Hey, Wormtail, you want me to go get a couple of those Christmas themed ice creams?"

"Okay. Just be sure to get me a snowman themed one."

"You got it."

Once Creepie had walked off to go purchase an ice cream, Wormtail96 turned around to look at the nativity display. He all ways enjoyed viewing a warm shrine of what Christmas _really _about. The cyborg wizard felt a finger jab him hard on the shoulder, making turn around and ask confused, "Yumi?"

"Hey..._hick_...Wormy." Yumi Yoshimura was wearing a large lavender furry coat, light purple gloves and a set of white earmuffs. In her hand she held a tall glass containing a misty blue beverage. It was easy to tell by her ditsy appearance that Yumi was at least somewhat drunk. "So how...how are ya....how are ya doin'?"

"Fine."

Yumi opened her mouth and poured down the blue alcoholic drink before saying to him, "Okay...that's great. That's great." She swirled the blue content around in the glass a few times and added slyly, "You know...I think I left my mistletoe back home. Weird, huh? You know, this is a really good romantic scene. Snow...decorations..." Yumi leaned forward dizzily and looked at the cyborg with flirty eyes. "...you and me...huh? Huh?"

"Yeah, uh, no." Wormtail96 took a rather big step back so that there was quite some distance between the two.

"Aww, come on." She tossed the glass hard on the snowy ground and advanced upon Wormtail with arms outstretched. "I'm not a freakin' leper! Come and give me a kiss!" Yumi grabbed a hold of the cyborg and started trying to kiss him, while he tried to push her off.

"What?! No, no, Yumi, you're drunk!" Wormtail96 had underestimated how strong the girl actually was as it was all most impossible to keep her grasping hands away. "No! Knock it off! Yumi!"

While this happened, Creepie walked up to Yumi and Wormtail while holding two snowmen ice creams and a cup of coffee. She watched the sight taking place before her with a blank look and after a moment or two, sighed heavily and made her way over to the scene.

"Hey, Yumi."

Yumi looked down and..._kick! _She toppled over holding onto her aching knee. "Ow!! Ow! What the Hell?! What the freakin' Hell?!"

"Hold these." Creepie handed the snowmen ice creams over to Wormtail96 and held onto to cup of coffee. She turned to Yumi and asked her as the pale girl opened up the lid of the coffee cup, "Hey, Yumi, how do you like your java?"

The drunken rock star girl looked down at her, growling angrily, "With a shot of whisky, you little twerp!"

"Let's try it black instead."

_Splash! _

**"AAGGHH!! IT BURNS!!" **Creepie had just tossed the black coffee straight into Yumi's face and down her throat! "You little bitch! I oughta-!!" She stopped and opened her eyes wide. She licked her own lips of the coffee and smiled, talking in a polite and now much less drunken voice, "Hey, I feel much better now. Thank you."

"No problem." Creepie took one of the snowmen themed ice creams from Wormtail96 and began licking away at it. "Now that's good stuff."

* * *

Meanwhile, on the stage in front of the entrance to City Hall, all the major politicians were standing on top preparing for the Presidential speech. Not the Mayoral speech from Republican Mayor Daffy Duck, but the actual Christmas speech from the President of Toontoria itself, Democrat Fred Fredburger! He was coming all the way from the Blue House to address the citizens of the country's capital and via television, the entire population.

Standing by the stage was Anchorman Dash Parr and Co-anchorman Sari Sumdac. Dash was dressed in his usual dark green armour like clothing with a green X in the middle of the chest part and a single purple line that went vertically behind the X. There were two giant zipped up pockets in the front of his hips on each side and there was a zipper that went straight down the lower half of his body. He also wore giant dark purple boots and gloves with silver cufflinks on his wrists. Sari was dressed in a thick yellow furry coat, yellow and silver boots and her large silver key tied around her neck. They were hired by the studio to go live at the all week city Christmas party.

"Hi, I'm Dash Parr..." Dash held up his microphone and spoke into the camera.

Sari pushed Dash aside and spoke into the camera with her own microphone, "And _I'm _Sari Sumdac. Tonight is the start of the six day long city Christmas party where-"

Dash pushed himself back into the camera's view and Sari out of the way. _"Where _Toon City Mayor Daffy Duck-"

"And more importantly, President of Toontoria, Fred Fredburger will be coming to address the nation!" Sari grunted as she forced herself back into the camera's view once again.

Glaring at his co-worker angrily, Dash pushed Sari back, remarking, "Hey, maybe you should tone down the teeth bleaching, Sari! You might just blind the folks at home!"

"Speak for yourself, Dash! I think you stuffing your crouch to the point of overflow might upset the feminists!" Sari pushed her co-worker back even harder.

"Oh, that's it!" And with that last insult dished out, the two news anchors threw themselves at each other in a violent fury, punching, kicking, etc. Violet Parr and Bumblebee just sighed exasperatedly, picked up Dash and Sari's microphones and proceeded to carry out the rest of the report themselves. All the while, Dash and Sari continued to fight each other savagely like animals, drawing attention from a small crowd of spectators.

Just then a long black limousine pulled up on the sidewalk, attracting the attention of all the citizens that were at the party. They all gathered around the limousine in a swarm, cheering wildly and holding up banners. Security guards marched around the limousine in a circle, keeping the large crowds at bay as the limo driver walked out and opened the passenger door. There was a moment's pause and finally, causing the crowd to cheer wildly, out came the Big Cheese himself!

The President of Toontoria, Fred Fredburger was a lime green dumb looking elephant creature with puny horns on his head and a spiked tail. He wore a dark blue suit, a white shirt and a black tie. But despite being the President, one could tell right away from his goofy expression that this guy was an idiot.

President Fredburger waved happily to the cheering crowd and walked happily down a fine purple carpet to the stage. Followed close behind him was Vice President of Toontoria Peter Griffin. He was a large fat guy who had brown hair and wore glasses, a black suit, white shirt and blue tie. Also, surrounding the two as they continued forward to the stage was a whole team of tall muscular bodyguards.

Once they had reached and climbed up the stage, Fredburger and Griffin shook Mayor Daffy Duck's hand. The duck Mayor walked up the podium with the Presidential seal on it and addressed the crowd of citizens through the microphone, _"People of Toontoria, I give you...President Fred Fredburger!!"_

The large crowd cheered loudly and wildly (except for staunch Republicans like Wormtail96 who unnoticeably jeered 'Boo!") as the President of Toontoria made his way over to the podium. Once he did, Fredburger cleared his throat, making the crowd quieten down. He spoke plainly and all most seriously at first into the microphone, _"People of Toontoria..." _Fredburger then put his two thumbs up and exclaimed loudly in a _Fonzie _impression,_ "Aaaaaaaay!" _This made the spectating crowd cheer louder and even laugh!

However, in the crowd, Wormtail96 stood there grumpily with his arms crossed while Yumi and Creepie laughed beside him along with most of the crowd. He looked at them and said crossly, "Why are you both laughing? All he did was just rip off the catchphrase of a famous television character!"

"Ah, shut up and eat your ice cream, worm bait!" Yumi told the cyborg wizard frowning, while still looking up at the stage.

Wormtail96 rolled his eyes and commented to himself with a huff, "For Pete's sake, this is just about as funny as the time I went to see the Grim Reaper do stand-up."

* * *

Wormtail96 was sitting down in a maroon seat in the front row of a large audience. They were watching the Grim Reaper himself standing up on stage with a microphone in hand. Grim leaned against his scythe and spoke with in his Jamaican voice, _"So what is the deal with airline food? Is this stuff bad or what?"_

The cyborg wizard spoke up from the audience and since was upfront; he easily made himself heard to Grim, "Aw, that's not nice; those chefs work really hard.

Grim frowned at Wormtail96's critique as it had to have been the fifth or sixth that night. But instead of letting it throw him off track, Grim continued, _"And what is with those Starbucks, huh? They're everywhere like the plague."_

"Umm...a lot of people want coffee; that's supply and demand, it's the foundation of our entire economy, Grim." Wormtail96 spoke out loudly to Grim, once again ruining his gag.

Grim was now really starting to get ticked off by Wormtail and said to him via microphone. _"Listen, mon. This is the best stuff I could get on short notice; so just bare with me, all right?" _He cleared his throat and spoke to the crowd once again, _"And who do I talk to about those long lines at the ATM? That's what I want to know."_

At that last bad joke, Wormtail96 stood up from his seat, stating, "Not me, Mr. Reaper. Someone who has time to fritter away, but not me." With that said, the cyborg wizard strolled simply up the walkway and out the exit, leaving a steaming Grim Reaper up on the stage and an audience staring perplexed.

* * *

By now, President Fredburger had just finished his speech to the nation and allowed Vice President Peter Griffin to come to podium to give his own speech. The big fat guy took out some papers and set them out on the front of the podium and spoke loudly to the watching nation, _"Good evening, people of Toontoria. As we all know, Christmas is that mystical time of year when the ghost of Jesus rises from the grave to feed on the flesh of the living. So we all sing Christmas carols to lull him back to sleep."_

Ned Flanders, who was standing in the ground was absolutely appalled by this and yelled out, "Outrageous! How dare he say such blasphemy! I've gotta do something!" He looked as if he was about to jump into action, but Reverend Lovejoy put his hand on the devout Christian's shoulder.

"Ned, there is nothing you can do." the Reverend told him plainly, stopping Flanders from doing anything to stop the Vice President.

Flanders lowered and shook his head, sighing, "You're right. I guess I'll just have to develop a sense of humour."

Back on the stage, Vice President Griffin now spoke nervously and started sweating, whilst he read from his papers,_ "And also, I would like to recommend to all Toon City visitors that, and I say this under my own free will, you should all check-in at your nearest Koopa Towers hotel. Koopa Towers, where quality stays high, while the prices remains low." _The crowd of visiting civilians looked at each other and mumbled quietly together in somewhat of agreement. On the while, not a single person there besides Peter Griffin took notice of the red dot shining on the Vice President's forehead.

* * *

Up above on the nearest roof top in front of the city Christmas party, a Koopa trooper kneeled down on the roof edge, aiming a sniper rifle down at the Vice President. He was ready to fire when given the orders by the large King Koopa behind him wearing a heavy jacket over his strong muscular body and spiked shell. It was King Bowser Koopa himself, the King of Darkland, and the founder and owner of all the _Koopa Towers_ across the globe.

Bowser crossed his arms and grinned maliciously down at the nervous Vice President below, "That's right, Mr. Vice President. Endorse away."

* * *

Back down at the Christmas party, Vice President Peter Griffin stepped down from the podium, feeling relieved that he was able to keep his head from being blasted off. It was now Mayor Daffy Duck's turn. The shifty Mayor marched up to podium, receiving very little or no applause (except from the Republican citizens like Wormtail96 who cheered 'Yeeeeeeeah! You rock!")

_"Helloooooo, Toon City, baby!!" _Daffy smiled to the watching nation, doing an impression of _The Big Bopper. _

This gag was so unpopular and lame to the whole crowd that none of them applauded and just glared daggers at him. One vague and unnoticed voice shouted out from the crowd, _"You suck!"_

_"Yeah, uh..." _Daffy Duck looked around uneasily and pulled on his collar shirt collar. _"So anyway, I was at the bar last night with my friends and..." _The Mayor's stopped in mid-sentence and his eyes widened as he pointed up into the sky in terror, _"What the Hell is that?!"_

The crowd of citizens and the camera showing the whole event to the Toontorian nation turned around to look up into the sky. It was a space ship darting down from the sky; but not just any space ship. It was coloured bright blue and it had the logo of a silver 'P' over a silver 'E' on the side. The ship was none other than the _Pete Express _delivery ship!

_Screeeee! _The crowd and nation camera turned their attention to an alleyway that illuminated brightly. Within seconds, out drove a brown van that read in green _'Season's beatings!' _from said alleyway and swerved around the scattering crowd. Both the ship and van drove burst into the city centre, causing everyone to panic as they took cover until....

_Crash!! _Both the _Pete Express _delivery ship and brown van crash landed/crashed into the nativity display, sending the props flying up into the sky!!

The crowd watched horror-stricken (especially Wormtail96 at the sight of the nativity display being destroyed) at the sight that had just taken place before them. Creepie's jaw dropped and she said slowly with emphasis on each word, _"Oh...my...God!!"_

The door of the brown van opened up and out walked none other than five out of eight of Wormtail96 and Creepie's roommates! It was Bender, No Limit 5, Yin, Yang, Jack Spicer but for some reason, no Zim. Immediately afterwards, the delivery ship door opened and a set of stairs descended down onto the snowy ground. Down came Zim (explaining why he was not in the van, since he was the ship's captain), Mr. Pete, the mysterious Janitor of _Pete Express, _Dr. Zoidburg, Ed, Edd and Eddy.

Bender drank from his booze bottle and glared at the group that had come out of the delivery ship, "No way, man! We got here first!"

"Liar!!" Dr. Zoidburg put his claw on his hip and pointed his other at the robot. He was wearing a Santa clause hat on top of his head. "We were here first!"

Janitor pushed Dr. Zoidburg out of the way, telling him sharply, "Shut it, Zoidburg! No one cares what _you _think!" He glared at the group that came out of the van and said to them crossly, especially to Bender, "But still, we one the race, soup can!"

"No one calls me 'soup can' and gets away with it!" At that, Bender and Janitor attacked each other with the Janitor winning over the bending unit in seconds.

NL shrugged and opened his can of _Pepsi, _saying, "Ah, who gives a damn? We're on vacation!" It was then that he saw the large crowd of citizens standing before them, still looking horror-stricken at what had just happened. "Hey, what's wrong with you guys?" NL took a look around the site in which the van and the ship had landed and realisation dawned upon them. "Oh...oh, God. Uh, sorry everyone...our bad....our bad."

"Hey, hold on a minute." Pete looked around suspiciously at the destroyed nativity display. "If this is the nativity display, where'd all them props go?" He heard a whistling noise and the two groups looked up in awe as several shadows formed over them. "Uh-oh."

_Crash! Smash! Crash! _The many nativity props that had been sent up into the air by the crash landed down on the groups, causing them to scream in terror.

Eddy stuck his head out of the wreckage and smiled as he looked around, "Oh, _here _they are."

* * *

**(A/N) And that is the end of the prologue to my short Christmas story. Each chapter shall be set on each Christmas day until December 25th. Next chapter is where the roommates and a lot of the wacky Toon City citizens spend some holiday fun at the Mall. Until then, Read and Review and have a Merry Christmas!**


	2. Chapter One: December 22nd

**(A/N) Seasons greetings everyone and welcome back to my annual Christmas story. In this chapter of the story, December 22nd, it's a hectic day at the Mall as the roommates and other Toon City civilians do their Christmas shopping**_**. **_**So read on and enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter One**

**December 22nd**

The Toon City Mall was especially busy at this Christmas time of year, especially since it was three days before the big day. The enormous bright marble white building was jam-packed with hundreds upon hundreds of civilians shoving and pushing passed each other savagely like animals.

"Get your hands off that pink bracelet, bitch!" Ami Onuki screamed as she smashed a chair over Nani Pelekai's head and taking the valuable pink bracelet she had been after for months now.

"Back! Get back, you savages!" The Hindu store manager Apu Nahasapeemapetilon cracked a whip before a wild crowd, preventing them from entering his Kwik-E-Mart convenience installed inside the Mall. "You all know the Mall rules! We open at 8:35, no earlier!" He then looked at wristwatch and said, "Whoops, my mistake! It is now 8:37. Please do come inside." Apu took out a key and unlocked the Kwik-E-Mart doors. However, this proved to be a fatal mistake as the crowd of shoppers flooded into the store like a tsunami. Apu screamed in terror as his body disappeared into the wave of shoppers, _"Thaaaank yoooooou!! Come agaaaaaaaaain!"_

* * *

Wormtail96 and Creepie were waiting outside the Toon City Mall front doors; their feet stuck deep in the snow and heads lowered as more of the white stuff fell down from the sky. After what seemed like an hour of waiting, their brown van pulled up on the sidewalk. It opened up and out walked the six remaining roommates, dressed up in winter articles of clothing.

"Hey, guys!" Yang smiled as he tied his dark blue scarf over his neck, pulled his dark blue gloves over his hands and started to drink a cup full of hot chocolate. He looked perplexed at Wormtail96 and Creepie's stern looks, "What's wrong with you two?"

"Quiet, you!" Creepie snapped angrily at the blue rabbit before turning back to the others. "So I am to presume your court hearing went well?"

"It sure did." Jack Spicer said proudly, motioning towards himself and Zim. "Zim and I even assumed the roles as our attorney since Lionel Hutz is currently under trial himself with that Jetson murder thing."

Zim nodded smugly, feeling all full of himself, "Indeed. That fool judge was no match for our judicial knowledge and tactics."

* * *

Inside the city's near enough empty courthouse, Bender, No Limit 5, Yin, Yang and the other participants of the incident last night sat down on separate tables near the front. Meanwhile, Jack Spicer and Zim were standing up between Judge Roy Spleen in his podium and their friends and roommates at their table.

"...and so your honour, those are the reasons to support our claim that we were falsely arrested." Jack Spicer told Judge Roy Spleen while crossing his arms firmly.

_"And _why we should each receive 5,000 Toontorian dollars in reparations!" Zim added just the same amount of self dignity as he stood his ground.

Judge Roy Spleen however, was not impressed in the slightest by the two's defence of their case. "Are you two kidding?! Why you people have to be the most deplorable no-good nicks I have ever seen in this city in all my years as its judge!! In fact, if I could..." He put his green yellow clawed hand to his chin and continued as he thought this new idea out, "I would put you all in a place where you would be removed from the general public. Perhaps locked in a big, secure building with other dangerous people for a pre-determined period of time based on the nature and degree of your offences." He then shrugged as he said the next part, "Unfortunately, as far as I know, no such place exists. So I have no choice but to set you all free." With that, Judge Roy Spleen banged his gavel onto his podium in conclusion of the trial.

"Great!" Jack Spicer punched his fist into the air in triumph. "So do we get our money?!"

"Hell no!"

Jack slapped his own forehead hard. "Damn it all!"

With their court hearing now over with them off the hooks, the roommates and the rest of the criminal offenders of the previous night stood up from their seats and made their way out of the courthouse. Yin looked up at Edd, telling him sounding flabbergasted, "Unbelievable. We near enough ruined the city Christmas party and we're getting off scot-free?!"

Edd nodded tiredly and said with a heavy sigh, "Don't get me wrong; I am glad we're not going to prison. But _this _is just a showcase of how bad our country's judicial system has gotten.

"Oh and by the way, Spleen." Janitor turned around briefly to look up at the monster judge. "That was _prison _you were thinking about. _Prison."_

Spleen banged his head and fist hard against his podium, yelling in annoyance, "Damn it! I all ready banged my gavel!"

* * *

Wormtail96 merely rolled his pitch red eyes and opened the door with his mechanical hand, telling his roommates, "Let's just _try _and get _most _of our Christmas shopping done. "That is..." He grunted loudly as he pushed himself into the hustling and bustling waves of shoppers, followed closely behind by his roommates. "If we'll live through it, that is..."

* * *

Later on that morning as it neared midday, the situation in the Mall had only gotten worse! In fact, the eight roommates were now even riding through the waves of shoppers on a boat. Seriously, an actual boat big enough to fit just about eight people. A dark grey ship with a black pirate flag that had a Jolly Rodger with a Santa Clause hat on its head.

Yin checked her own list, saying as she ticked through each bullet pointed line, "Okay, I've nearly finished my shopping list. How about you guys?"

"I'm getting there." Yang said, checking through a list of his own. He stopped halfway when he saw a hand raising up into the boat, reaching for a shopping bag. "Hey, hold on." Yang pulled out a gun and _bang, _shot at the hand! The owner of the hand screamed in agony and recoiled back into the wave of shoppers.

"Okay, I just gotta go get something for Creepie here and I'll be done." Zim told his eight roommates, while giving a wink to the repulsed Creepie Creecher as he climbed aboard a small black dingy at the side of the boat and slowly lowered himself into sea of shoppers. "I might be a while though, so I won't recommend you wait for me at the coffee shop."

"Hold on, I'm coming with ya. I need to get something for Creeps as well." Jack Spicer said to his Irken roommate, while getting into the dingy alongside him. They untied the ropes, allowing the dingy to be sent of sailing through the customer 'sea'. Neither the little Irken and evil boy genius lasted a minute as their dingy was torn to sunder by the battering 'waves' of the shopper 'sea'. Zim's person vanished within the 'sea' instantly and Jack's seconds afterwards.

"Well, there goes Zim and Jack." NL took the pirate hat he was holding and put it to his chest. "I knew them well."

Bender was sitting on the poop deck of the miniature boat next to No Limit 5 and drank from a carton of eggnog. "Ah, don't worry about those two. They've done even crazier things than _this_ before."

* * *

It was the North Pole, December 24th, Christmas Eve. The night sky descended over the humble looking gift shop as good old Santa Clause walked outside into the snow and over to his sleigh. It was time for him to set off to complete his Christmas route and deliver presents to all good little boys and girls over the world. He petted each reindeer on the head as he hobbled past them and finally climbed up into the sleigh next to his sack, grabbed the reins and was about to talk off when...

**"****GET OUT OF THE FREAKING SLEIGH!!!"** Santa Clause turned his head to see Jack Spicer and Zim there holding the jolly old elf at gunpoint

**"GET OUT OF THE FREAKING SLEIGH RIGHT NOW, CLAUSE!!!"** Jack Spicer screamed even louder than Zim did before, holding his shaking gun at Santa's head.

**"OH, DEAR JESUS!!!"** Santa Clause screamed, looking absolutely terrified.

Zim held his gun dangerously close to the fat guy's face, **"WE SAID GET OUT OF THE FREAKING SLEIGH!!!"**

**"OH, MY GOD!!!"** Fearing for his life, Santa Clause went into a paralyzed state, letting the two start to roughly pull him out of the sleigh.

**"DO IT! GO! DO IT OR I SWEAR TO GOD, WE'LL FREAKING KILL YOU!!!"** Jack Spicer kicked the now terrified old elf onto the snow.

**"THAT'S RIGHT!! GET THE HELL OUT OF THE FREAKING SLEIGH!!!" **Zim screamed one last time at the top of his lungs and he and Jack climbed quickly into the sleigh. Santa crawled away through the snow still screaming in fear.

Jack Spicer glared at the stunned reindeer that had watched the whole event in shock. **"WELL WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS LOOKING AT!!! MUSH! MUSH! MUSH!"** He pulled on the reins and he yelled this and so the reindeer galloped up through the snow and took off into the night sky.

* * *

Time passed and gang parked their boat outside a store deep within the bowls of the Toon City Mall. Wormtail96 and No Limit 5 jumped off and made their way through the violent, all most homicidal shoppers crowd to buy gifts for the rest of their roommates. They had all ready got each other a gift or two, now the two good chums needed to find something for the rest of their friends. Well, not friends but still roommates none the less, so they were being them things that were cheap. So where else to buy cheap but thoughtful gifts for friends/roommates than the 99p store.

Finally, the two found themselves at the shopping till and put several bags on top in front of a teenage store clerk. He was a yellow skinned guy with brown hair and pimples on his face. The two roommates handed over the money for the gifts and the teenage clerk bagged the items.

"There you go, sir." NL said as he handed over the rest of the money over while the teenage clerk continued ringing up the items.

Wormtail96 looked at No Limit 5 and asked him as they waited for their purchased items to be packed. "So what have you got the others?"

"Well, I bought Jack some new socks, the same type of jumper for Zim but dark blue and for Bender..." NL jabbed his thumb to a large dark green bottle of champagne being packed away into the bag by the teen clerk. He took out an ID card and showed it before clerk to prove his age, allowing the clerk to proceed in his packing. "I think you all ready have a good idea. I got Yin, Yang and Creepie's a few weeks ago."

"Amazing." Wormtail96 shook his head exasperatedly as he watched the champagne be stuffed into the bags. "In America, the minimal drinking and purchasing limit of alcohol is 21. In the UK, 18. And over here, 15?!"

No Limit 5 leaned against the till and asked the cyborg wizard, "Well, what did you get for the others then?"

"I've all ready got Bender, Zim and Jack something last week." Wormtail96 tapped the shopping bag that was currently being packed with his gifts for Yin, Yang and Creepie with the back of his mechanical hand. "For Yin, I got her a lovely bottle of frankincense, Yang a few bottles of myrrh and for my little cousin Creepie a pure gold ring. Pretty good gifts if I do say so myse-"

"Hold on, hold on, hold on!" No Limit 5 put his hands up and gave his friend a 'what the Hell' look. "You're telling me that you found frankincense, myrrh and _genuine _gold at a Mall and bought each one for 99p?!"

Wormtail96 crossed his mechanical arms together and nodded. "Yeah, Toontoria's great, isn't it? Well...except for the Deep South of it."

The teen clerk had now just finished packing the bags and handed over Wormtail96 and No Limit 5's change. "And here is your change, Mr. Wormtail and Mr. Limit." He said to them with a

No Limit 5 counted up the change and looked confused at the squeaky voiced teen as he and Wormtail96 picked up their bags. "Um, are you sure this is the right change? I'm sure we should get more back than this."

"Ah, you see most of the items come with tax." The squeaky voiced teen explained.

Wormtail96 arched his brow perplexed. "You ever think about changing the sign?"

"Well, it's not really up to me."

"Okay then." Wormtail96 shrugged and with that, the two took the rest of the bags and made their way away from the till. "Merry Christmas."

"Happy Holidays."

That proved to be a grave mistake as it caused Wormtail96 to stop in his tracks and turn his head slowly to look at the teen clerk menacingly. NL covered his face with his hand, muttering, "Oh, no." He knew that things were going to get ugly now. Wormtail96 was very conservative; not just in politics but in social matters as well. He was most definitely not a big fan of Christmas secularism and he would make it his goal all most every Christmas to ensure the true meanings of the holiday were spread around. He understood some people were not too religious like he was about Christmas but he did not like it when it came to the point of secularism affecting how he celebrated the holiday. This would be from saying 'Happy Holidays' to him all the way to hanging a non-Christmas specific banner being put up on the apartment wall.

"I, uh, said Merry Christmas." Wormtail96 marched up to the squeaky voiced teen sternly.

"Happy holidays." the teen clerk repeated.

Wormtail96's red eyes narrowed. "Just say Merry Christmas."

"I'm sorry, sir, but management wants us to use the 'Happy Holidays' phrase instead." The squeaky voiced teen's eyes darted around a bit uneasily as he tried to reason with the cyborg wizard. "That way, people who aren't too religious will feel a bit more comfortable by knowing the season isn't labelled to just the Christian holiday."

At that, Wormtail96 pulled out a German Luger and pointed it at the teen's mouth. "Just say it or I'll blow your bloody face in!"

* * *

Moments later the two found themselves tossed out of the store and onto their boat with all their bags. No Limit groaned and rubbed his sore head as he stood up on the boat and took care of the bags. Concerning Bender, Yin, Yang and Creepie, the four were busy fighting off hoards of desperate shoppers trying to pillage any Christmas presents they could find.

Yang pulled out his gun and shot randomly at the derranged shoppers, killing many on fire. "Back! Get back, you sickos! Get your own damn stuff!"

Wormtail96 sat up angrily on the poop deck and turned his attention back to the store he was just tossed out of, calling into it, "I believe I had a Luger!"

After a couple of seconds, the Luger was tossed out of the store, hitting Wormtail96 hard on the head. He picked it up and saw that it was covered in bright blue Christmas wrapping with snowmen as decorative patterns on it.

_"Happy Holidays!" _The squeaky voiced teen yelled again from within the store, causing Wormtail96 to growl in frustration and anger.

* * *

Meanwhile, with Zim and Jack, the two were looking around the jewellery stands, looking for something for Creepie. The two decided it best that to combine their budget money for her gift in order to buy the Goth girl something great. Something so good that it would keep her off their back...for the next few months at least.

"There!" Zim pointed to a pair of green jewelled barrettes in the forms of beetles. "Creepie's gonna love these!" He and Jack walked up to it and the latter was about to grab them when another hand grabbed them first. The hand belonged to an old and very short woman who had white hair tied up into a bonnet, wore a green cardigan and held onto a cane. Her name was Madam Foster, the founder of Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. "Hey!"

"Maybe...but I think Frankie will want these more!" Madam Foster held onto the green jewelled beetle barrettes tightly in her fist.

Jack Spicer narrowed his eyes and held up a gun, aiming it directly at Madam Foster. "You _sure _you still want them, ya bony old hag?"

_Thwack! Thwack! _Both Jack and Zim toppled over screaming and holding onto the aching knees as Madam Foster struck at their legs with her cane. She laughed and ran off down into the Mall. "See ya, suckers!!"

Jack and Zim pulled themselves to their feet and took chase of the old lady. They ran in and out between all shoppers that got in their way, even assaulted them violently to get passed them and keep track of Madam Foster. The two soon found themselves passing a map of the Mall installed onto a pedestal and gave it a look. It showed two red stars that read above 'you are here' and another star that was not far off, saying above 'she is here'. All though both of them were very confused at this, they gave each other a shrug and continued their chase.

* * *

Within minutes, Madam Foster found herself in a pet store being back down an aisle of tanks filled with many types of fish by Jack Spicer and Zim. The Irken cackled deviously as he and his evil boy genius accomplice slowly advanced upon the old lady, "Aha! All the clown fish and yellow tangs in the universe cannot help you now, old she male."

Seeing a few tubs of fish food stacked up in pyramid next to her, Madam Foster smirked and dropped her cane. She grabbed a few tubs of fish food and flung them at the Irken and pale red head. The tubs opened up in midair and the contents spilled all over Jack and Zim.

Jack looked over the fish food granules on his clothes and grinned evilly over at Madam Foster, rebuking snidely, "Ha! That's it? Fish food, granny? That's your ace in the hole? Huahahahahaha-!!"

_Crash! _Both Zim and Jack's overly confident laughter was cut short when the windows of the fish tanks crashed open! The water poured out the broken tanks like miniature floods and the hundreds upon hundreds of fish launched out upon the two fish food covered roommates. The two screamed loudly in terror as they collapsed to the flooded floor with the hoard of fish pecking away them. Zim especially as his green skin was dangerously sensitive to the water, making it burn and causing the Irken intense pain. All the while, Madam Foster laughed in triumph and ran off with the green jewelled barrettes now in her possession.

* * *

A short while on, the rest of the roommates had managed to find and pick up Jack and Zim after the duo's near traumatic experience with the fish. In the centre of the Mall near the enormous ornate Christmas tree, the setting of the Mall's _Santa's Grotto. _

While the others were standing in ten mile line of _Santa's Grotto, _Yang stayed behind to quickly park the boat amongst the other boats some shoppers had used. A couple of validating employees tied the boat down so it would not flow away and the blue rabbit climbed out, speaking threateningly to one validating employing, "Okay pal, I'm just warning you; I counted the pennies in the ashtray. So if you try and snatch anyway, I'll put 600 grams of hot lead into your gut!"

"Move it! Out of the way! You too fatso!" Yang pushed and shoved his way through the ever lasting line of _Santa's Grotto _until he reached his roommates and sister. "Hey, guys!"

"Hey!" A female teenage Who cried upset. She herself was a very tall and large teenage girl, her body fur consisting of big cyan and purple stripes. Her face was a rather pale white colour and her matching smooth yet tatty cyan and purple hair was tied up into two long slightly messy pigtails. This giant of a Who was wearing a worn-out blue denim coat with thick brass buttons. This was Daisy McDodd. "You can't cut in line like that!"

Yang scoffed arrogantly and crossed his arms, "Well, boo-hoo for you, Daisy! What's a big dumb retarded kid like you do about it?" He threw his head back and laughed, "Heh, heh, heh, heh."

"Hey, Yang, you can't talk to my daughter like that!" A Who next to Daisy snapped at the small blue rabbit angrily. She wore a red furry dress with her long hair curled up tall. Her name was Sally McDodd, Daisy's mother. "Who do you think you are, anyway?"

"Oh, big tough _woman,_ eh?" Yang mocked her, becoming full of himself. "What are _you _gonna do, _woman?" Kick! _Sally swung her foot and kicked Yang in the groin. "Ow! What the Hell, Sally?! What the Hell?!" _Pow! _Daisy crossly raised her massive fist and slammed it down on Yang's head. "Oh, Jesus! So much for you being the peaceful type, Daisy!" _Thwack! _Yin slugged Yang in the back of his head. "Owww! Yin, why did _you _hit me?!"

"I dunno." Yinshrugged carelessly and uncaringly. "Just went along with the rhythm, I guess."

Daisy stuck her tongue out at the blue rabbit, "Stupid head."

Jack and Zim looked at Creepie, Wormtail96 and No Limit 5 looking soaked from head to toe. They also had several peck marks on their faces and their clothes were not only drenched but roughed up as well. Jack covered his arms around his sides and retold the events to them, "Oh, you guys, it was _horrific!!_ The fish were jumping all over ours eyes and in my nose. And on the way out, I think one of them muttered something anti-Semitic!"

Bender looked up ahead and saw standing before him four male Trogs with a large number of ravenous little troglodytes standing next to them. It was Stitch and Leroy Jookiba, Shoe Karkaroff and Scorpio Skullclaw, the Turogian accountants who managed the _Pete Express _delivery business. The troglodytes at their feet were most likely their bratty children.

"Stitch, guys? What are you doing here?" Bender asked them confused.

Stitch glared over his shoulder at the bending unit, "Taking our kids to see 'Santa'? What the Hell are _you _doing here?"

"Ah, you know how WT is with Christmas. He's here to get Creepie's picture taken with 'Santa'."

One of the troglodytes at Stitch's feet, presumably the oldest glared up at the bending unit, asking his father, "Hey, Dad. Who's this guy?"

Stitch looked back down at the one of his many children and told him, "Ryan, this is Bender, the cook on the delivery ship at where I work. The drunken belligerent robot I told you about."

"Oh, yeah." Ryan scowled over at the bending unit, commenting rudely, "You're that loud-mouthed, drunken and stupid tin can!" He snorted obnoxiously, "My Dad's told me about all those times you've screwed up! You're a loser! Boo!" the spoiled little Troglodyte poked his tongue out and blew a loud raspberry at the robot.

Bender glowered down at the Troglodyte angrily and advanced upon him furiously. "Why you snotnosed little-!!"

Stitch came in between the two, saying to Bender warningly, "Bender, knock it off!" He then whispered secretly to the bending unit, _"There's a snowball fight tomorrow in the park at 6:00 pm. Get 'em there!" _This made the belligerent robot grin malicious and rub his metal hands together.

* * *

After fifteen minutes or so of waiting in line, it was finally Creepie's time to sit on 'Santa's' lap. This supposed large Santa Clause was dressed up in the standard cheep uniform and white beard. He wore glasses and resembled someone rather familiar to a lot of the shoppers in the Mall.

In _Santa's Grotto, _there was a white dog that wore a green elf uniform and also looked quite familiar to some shoppers in the Mall. He went to the front of the line and said to Creepie in front, "Okay, kid, you're next to see Santa Clause."

Creepie eyed the white dog oddly as she followed him to large ornate throne on which 'Santa' sat upon lazily. "You look familiar. Have I seen you in the newspapers about some political scandal sometime ago?"

The white dog pulled on his collar nervously. "Uh, no...no. You must be thinking of some _other _white dog." He said as he hurried the Goth girl over to the supposed Santa and helped her onto the jolly old elf's lap. "Now let's get you onto Santa's lap. There you go. Now I'm just gonna go take a picture." The white dog covered half of his face and ran back over to a tripod camera, getting ready to take the picture.

"Merry freakin' Christmas, kid!" The large supposed Santa said to her jovially with a voice that sounded as if he came directly from Rhode Island. "So whatcha want?"

"To rule the world with an iron fist and crush all my enemies with no mercy." Creepie spoke darkly as if some mysterious phantom from a children's nightmare.

"Don't we all, kid?" The supposed Santa said dryly and began to ramble on, "I mean, Hell, I wanted to get a golden statue built in front of the Blue House, but those clowns in Congress were all 'That is a waste of tax payers' money'! Waah! Waah! Bunch of wusses!"

"Aha! I knew it! Creepie jumped up onto 'Santa's' knee and pointed her finger accusingly at the fat man. "You're not Santa! You're a big fat fake!"

This caused the crowd of shoppers in the line and those watching the scene to gasp in surprise. The supposed Santa looked around worriedly and said in his defence, "Uh...uh...sure I'm Santa, kid. What makes you so sure I'm not, kid?"

Creepie tapped her index finger as she listed her points, "One: Santa Clause does _not _have any ties to the Toontorian Congress." She tapped her middle finger. "Two: Santa Clause is _not _a Toontorian politician period!" She folded her arms firmly as to show that her view was not about to be changed. "I might not be for certain if Santa Clause really does exist, but I can say for definite that he's not you!"

'Santa' was now started to get ticked off by Creepie's stubbornness. "Look, kid. I'm telling ya right now, I the genuine article Santa Clause!"

"No you are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

Now at the verge of his patience and composure, 'Santa' narrowed his eyes and snapped to the little Goth girl, "I am _the _Chris Kringle in the flesh! And if say one more time that I'm not, I swear to God I'll-!"

_Rip! Flash! _As the white dog in the elf costume took the picture, Creepie Creecher suddenly ripped the white beard clean off the supposed Santa's face. This revealed the fat man to really be...

"Vice President Peter Griffin!!" Creepie declared loud enough for everyone in a ten block radius to hear.

The crowd gasped in shock at this sudden revelation and the white dog groaned and covered his eyes, knowing things were about to turn ugly.

No Limit 5 ran over to the white dog in the elf attire and grabbed a hold of his bell hat. "And so that means this guy is..." He tore the hat off. "Secretary of the Treasury, Snoopy!"

The white dog glared up at the teenage superhero. "No, I'm Secretary of State Brian Griffin, you idiot!"

"...oh."

Peter Griffin was now about to advance upon Creepie, pulling up his sleeves angrily, "Oh, you are freakin' dead, kid! I'm gonna-!"

"Hey!" Peter and Creepie stopped what they were doing and turned to see an angry Daisy McDodd pointing at the first. "She's right! This guy isn't Santa at all!"

A CIA agent named Stan Smith who was standing in line with his family shook his fist furiously. "This Mall lied to us!"

Seeing the now pissed off crowd was now starting to get reckless, Brian Griffin put his hands up and tried to reason with them. "Now, everyone, let's all be cool here. There's no need to do anything crazy like start a riot."

Police Chief Wiggum smiled happily for a brief moment. "Hey, that's a great idea." He then held up a flaming torch, roaring loudly like a blood-thirsty war general, **"LET'S START A RIOT!!!"**

At last, the Mall hard turned from a mad, nearly homicidal shopping frenzy to a miniature apocalypse contained within the walls!! The thousands upon thousands of Mall shoppers picked up flaming torches, pitchforks and other various instruments and began tear the place apart in an orgy of extreme carnage!! Decorations and displays were tipped over, smashed or even set of fire! Stores' windows were smashed open and looted or better yet pillaged by the furious shoppers!

**"This is for making me believe!!"** Moe Szyslak, owner and Bartender of _Moe's Tavern's Mos Eisley Cantina_ picked up a display snowman and held it over his head. He mercilessly crashed it down against Secretary of State Brian Griffin's head. "Take that, Mr. Secretary of State...sir!"

Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy each grabbed a side of the large Christmas tree in the middle of the Mall and began shaking it back and forth. The many baubles and other tree decorations came dropping down from the sky like shell projectiles in the Great Wars.

Daisy McDodd grabbed a hold of Vice President Peter Griffin and held his arms behind his back. This allowed a midget of a Who coloured dark grey and black fur-wise and had long black hair to continuously pummel Griffin in the stomach. This was Jojo McDodd, Sally's son and Daisy's big brother.

"Oh, Come oooon!" Vice President Peter Griffin begged as more people began to join Jojo in beating the living tar out of the pony fat man. "It's just to buy some votes!!"

_"You sliiiime!!" _Yumi screeched, picking up a crowbar and beating it around screaming Peter's head viciously.

Jojo pulled back his balled up fist and roared, "Merry..." He punched Griffin hard in the stomach, making the latter topple over. _"Fistmas, _jerk wad!!"

* * *

The eight roommates were standing outside the Mall which had now gone up in a plume of fire and smoke. Wormtail96, Yin and Creepie lifted all the shopping bags into the brown van while the rest continued to watch the spectacle before them. Yang let out a long whistle, "Wow, I _do not _envy the guys that have to clean this up."

"Why is that every time we got to a city event, it either ends being destroyed or set on fire?!" Wormtail96 asked exasperatedly as he got up in the front seat next to Yin, whom was the only one sober enough to drive.

No Limit 5 laid back in one of the back seats, answering his friend as he did, "Because just about all of us are a bunch of malcontents, that's way."

"Yeah, that about sums it up." Bender nodded in agreement a metal lid covered his eyes so he could catch some sleep.

Yin looked around at her roommates and brother. "So you guys got everything you need because we're not going back there?" Everyone else muttered things along the lines of 'yes', 'I think so' and 'just about'. "Great!"

Creepie looked back in concern at the blazing Mall. "How long do you think that's gonna go on for anyway?"

Zim shrugged and waved his hand uncaringly, "Ah, it'll blow over within a couple of hours."

"You sure?"

"Come on, Creeps." Jack smirked in over confidence at the little Goth girl. "What? You think it's gonna take as long to blow over as Homer Simpson to get intimate with his wife?"

* * *

In the Simpsons' household, Marge Simpson laid down on her bed in pink drag with her husband, Homer Simpson sitting up straight next to her. He was wearing blue nightwear, a pair of reading glasses and was reading a green book titled _'Astrophysics for Dummies'._

"Homer..." Marge said to him wooingly as she huddled up close to her husband. "...how about tonight we 'rock the casbah'?"

Homer put his hand up, saying very intelligently for someone of a low IQ as his, "Margery, please. Can you not see that I am trying to expand and improve my knowledge on the vast and elaborate field of the scientific laws of the known universe?"

"Wait...whaaat?" Marge asked him, completely dumbfounded at this sudden display of high intelligence.

"What?" Homer asked in a dumb voice, sounding just as confused as his wife.

* * *

Around midnight, the carnage and bloodshed coming from the Toon City Mall was still as horrific as ever. Jack Spicer, sick of the loud noise coming from the building, poked his head out the _Koopa Towers _window and screamed, **"Dudes! Shut up! Some of us are trying to sleep here!" **The loud noise coming from the blazing Mall quietened down a bit more for Spicer's liking and the evil boy genius called in great relief but still annoyance, **"Thank you!!"**

* * *

**(A/N) And I shall end it right there, I think. I can tell you all right now that I enjoyed writing this chapter and about all the social satire you would find at a Mall or Shopping Centre at the Christmas time. Also, there was that segment with me and NL about the current Christmas controversy of the modern age, something I actually feel strong about. I did enjoy adding that in as it does somewhat spread an important message. In the next chapter, we shall see how one demonic Janitor can lead a bunch of idiotic politicians into a parade of drunken social chaos and damage of property. This next chapter is for you, No Limit 5. Until next time, Read and Review and a Merry Christmas to all!**


	3. Chapter Two: December 23rd

**(A/N) Seasons greetings everyone and welcome back to my annual Christmas story. In this chapter of the story, December 23rd, a certain mysterious and trickster janitor will be leading a group of politicians in their own brand of "Christmas partying." Vandalism and destruction of public property are inevitable.****So read on and enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter Two**

**December 23rd **

It was December 23rd, the day before Christmas Eve and two days before Christmas Day. Even after the carnage at the Toon City Mall, the citizens were still scavenging the city for as much presents and merchandise they could get their hands on. Now, while there were those like Wormtail96 that loved Christmas and were determined to celebrate it the traditional way, there were some buffoons out there that only saw it is an excuse for a week or two to get drunk and party like wild animals. Other than that, Christmas was just another miserable day to them. Actually, there were only few that were like that to the core whom rally others to join their crusade of booze and street fighting. In fact, the General of this army of binge-drinking wild partying was about to unleash his small army, consisting of _the _most top men in the country of Toontoria...

"So, uhh...whatcha think of the party?" President Fredburger asked Vice President Peter Griffin, the latter wearing a few medical casts after the events of the previous day. They were both holding glasses of champagne and standing in a near bored manner besides a decorated table. The two were dressed in their finest suits for that particular special night.

"Yeah, it's pretty good." Peter took a sip of his champagne dully. "Not bad...not bad..."

It was the Blue House Christmas Party, where all the major politicians of the country came together to celebrate the Yuletide season in a fancy-pants party. These leaders, officials and representatives came together not as Republicans, Democrats nor those third parties that no one paid any attention to, but as equal Toontorian politicians. However, unless there was some big event that took place, the evening did tend to be rather dull and bland. This evening seemed to be no exception.

Secretary of State Brian Griffin sat down on a chair next to the table at which Fred Fredburger and Peter stood by. He only had a few bandages here and there after what had happened at the Toon City Mall yesterday, since it was really Peter whom had received the most damage. "This party has become dead lame and it's only the first hour."

Peter nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I mean, God, this was nothing like last year's Christmas party." He let out his trademark mindless laugh as he remembered the Blue House Christmas party of 2007. "That night was frickin' hysteric!!"

Brian looked at Peter and reminded him sternly, "Peter, we cut off the lower half of a waiter's body just to keep us from falling asleep!"

* * *

Last year in 2007, a waiter was on the floor screaming hysterically and waving his arms frantically in the air. The reason; his entire lower half had been sawed roughly off by Peter Griffin!

**"AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!" **The waiter screamed what had to have been the worst states of agony possible.

A group of horror-stricken politicians, including Fred Fredburger, Brian Griffin and Peter Griffin (whom was holding the blooded saw) stood around the horrific sight screaming in terror. **"AAAAGGGGHHHH!!! AAAGGHH!! AAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!!"**

**"OH MY GOD!!!" **A gray haired yellow skinned man around his forties screamed, grasping each side of his head horrified. He wore a dark blue suit with several medals attached, a white button-up shirt underneath said suit, a red tie, and grey hush puppy shoes. This was Secretary of Defence, Seymour Skinner.

**"OH, JEEZ!! THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!!" **Peter looked at the blooded saw in his hand and dropped it onto the floor.

Brian glared up at the Vice President and snapped in frustration, **"YOU REALLY THINK SO, YA DUMBASS?!?!"**

The bifurcated waiter looked up at President Fred Fredburger and screamed wildly and pleadingly, _**"PLEASE KILL ME!!!!"**_

* * *

Peter stood there wide-eyed and then shuddered. "Oh, yeah. Now I remember...that was scary."

Secretary of State Brian Griffin looked at his wrist watch and then said to the President boredly, "Uh, Mr. President, I believe it is time for you to make your speech to the guests."

President Fred Fredburger sighed tiredly, rolling his eyes, "Okay..." He let out a long low groan and trotted his way up onto the stage. He got up in front of the podium which had the presidential seal on it and tapped his glass of champagne with a spoon next to the microphone. _"Umm, attention everybody. Attention. Attention." _The crowd of Congressmen, Senators, Governors, etc turned their attention to their Commander 'n' Chief dully. _"So yeah, uh...I would just like to say, uh..." _He searched through his pockets for his speech written down on a piece of paper. When he found it, the green elephant creature held it up in front of his eyes and read it out monotonously, _"Thank you all for coming and Merry Christmas."_

The Mayor of Toon City Daffy Duck clapped loudly and enthusiastically, cheering as he did, "Yeah! You said it, Mr. President! Woo, woo, woo!!"

Meanwhile, the rest of the crowd clapped in applause slowly and unenthusiastically for their President, who of which just descended from the podium and across the stage. However, when he had just reached the beginning of the steps, there was a loud whistle, catching everyone's attention.

_"Hey, fat cats!"_

President Fred Fredburger, Vice President Peter Griffin and many of the other politicians rotated their heads and saw a very tall man near the entrance. He had very short black hair and a rather mean look on his face. He also wore a grey jumpsuit with a nametag that simply said, 'JANITOR' and on the back said 'MAINTANCE'. It was none other than the feared but also hilarious Janitor, who took a cigarette out of his mouth and whistled, "Now what the Hell is this? A party or a mosaic?"

Brian looked the Janitor suspiciously, stepping forward, "How'd you get passed security?"

Instead of answering Brian's question, Janitor addressed all the politicians in general. "I heard you guys are in need some excitement, right?"

"What was your first clue, Jacko?" Congressman Herschel Shmoikel Pinkus Yerucham Krustofski, more commonly known as Krusty the Clown crossed his arms flatly.

"Well..." The Janitor opened the door from which he entered a massive metal tray. On top of it was a _massive _keg with several glasses surrounding the latter. "I took a major notice of your lack of alcoholic variety. How about we try out something of my own creation?"

Many of the politicians looked at other confused, until Fred Fredburger shrugged to them with a 'what have we got to lose' look. He stepped up in front of the keg and poured himself an odd coloured fizzy liquid from it into his glass. Fred looked at Grievous unsure and asked him as he put the glass to his lips, "So what's this then? Some different kind of champagne?"

"Not really..." Janitor said just in time for Fred to sip down the beverage. "It's quite an interesting concoction you're drinking there, let me tell ya."

Fred smiled after he had finished his drink, saying to his fellow politicians, "Hey, you guys, this is very good. Try it out." The other politicians shrugged to each other, made their way to the keg and poured themselves drinks of this alcoholic beverage. Soon, just about every single politician at the Blue House Christmas Party had gotten themselves a drink of this obscure alcoholic beverage of the Janitor's.

Brian took a sip of the drink and actually smiled himself, "Woah. I...I actually gonna admit. This is...very good. Very good."

However, Peter began to get drowsy and tipsy, smiling in a goofy fashion. "You're damn right, Brian...ya son of a bitch." He slugged Brian hard on the shoulder and laughing in a very drunken manner. "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Oh, Jesus! I am _slammed!"_

Brian himself was starting to feel light headed and dizzy, his eyes widening in realisation. The Secretary of State looked up at the Janitor and asked him furiously, his legs wobbling, "What did you do to this alcohol? What did you do?!"

Janitor smirked evilly and leaned against the giant keg, "Oh, it's just a little mixture of..." he tapped his chin with his finger as he thought it through, "Vodka...gin..._Duff _beer...Pawtucket Pat's beer...oh, yeah and a little dash of 'Chemical X'" He held up a dark blue bottle labelled 'X'.

"Oh, my God! This spiiiii...." Secretary of Defence Seymour Skinner exclaimed before drifting off into a drunken stupor. "Uhhhh....uhhhhh....oh, dear..."

This very same feeling began to spread out around the guest politicians whom had taken a drink from this strange beverage. Their heads became light and dizzy, their legs turned to jelly (not literally, of course) and their vision became distorted and out of focus. All those different types of alcohol, including the 'Chemical X' was having more major effects on them than the champagne they had been drinking all night.

"You...you son of a...ugh...!" Brian began before collapsing to his knees and vomiting on the floor in front of the Janitor.

"That's _just _what I thought you would say. Now if you would excuse me..." Janitor shoved Brian aside and pushed through the crowd of politicians who were becoming drunk and tipsy. He mad his way over to the President of Toontoria himself, Fred Fredburger, the top man. He put his hand on the green elephant creature's shoulder and snickered, "So Mr. President, what are you gonna do now?" Janitor leaned in and whispered into his ear, _"Say 'party'."_

"By Presidential decree..." Now obviously drunk, President Fred Fredburger unbuttoned his suit and punched his fist into the air, cheering loudly, "LET'S PARTYYYYYYYY!!!!"

Many of the other politicians cheered loudly and drunkenly in agreement. **"YYYEEEAAAHHH!!! PAAAAAAAAARTYYYYYYYYY!!! LET'S ROOOOCK!!" **The politicians began unbuttoning their suits and top buttons and loosening their ties.

"Then follow me, boys." Janitor instructed as opened the doors of the entrance and marched outside, the politicians following close behind. "Because it's high-time this city learned what a true party is! And it's up to us, well mainly you to set the example!!"

Brian still maintained his common sense and exclaimed outraged to his fellow politicians, while still feeling the affects of the alcohol taking place upon him, "What?! Where are you guys going?! Are you all insane?!"

Peter passed Brian, saying to white dog with an annoyed groan, "We're going to go to a _real _party, Brian. And the Janitor is taking us to the merry old Land of Oz" He paused and laughed at that last part of his sentence, "Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, heh."

"What the Hell is wrong with you people?!" Brian could not believe what he was hearing from these people he worked with and had known for years.

"What's wrong with us?! What's wrong with _you,_ Brian?!" Peter snapped back, still in a heavily drunken stupor. "You know, you used to be _so _cool! But then you got made Secretary of State and became a freakin' hard ass! What happened to the old Brian that used to drink his ass off and nail a different girl every night?"

Brian pushed Peter backwards and snapped, "Hey, I'm still that same guy, all right?!"

"Prove it!" Peter held up a glass filled with the dangerous drink of Janitor's.

Finally pushed over the edge, Brian snatched the glass from Peter's hand, threw back his head with his mouth open tossed the drink down his gullet. That last glass was at last enough to dull the white dog's senses and mind to point of him becoming as giddy as school girl. "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!" He and Peter locked arms together and skipped merrily outside the entrance along with many others of the drunken politicians.

* * *

Outside the Blue House, the politicians led by Janitor marched down the steps of the entrance. These people were even more drunk than a bunch of frat boys on a Saturday night. They mounted their vehicles, those that came in them and drove off away from the Blue House into the city, laughing wildly.

Janitor and President Fred Fredburger mounted the same motorbike and each put on a rounded helmet. The cackling Janitor turned his head to ask the President, "Hey, Pres? You think I oughta switch on some tunes?!" The President nodded slowly and goofily, making the wicked maintenance man switch on the radio. With a jolt, their motorbike set off down the streets of Catoonsylvania Avenue.

Janitor: _**We're the kinda guys that celebrate the holiday a different way, **_

President Fred Fredburger: _**Like drinking all the way, that**__**'**__**s us,**_

The two grabbed a light strand and swung their bike around it. Then they tied the strand around a couple of people carrying a tree.

Janitor and Fred Fredburger: _**We don**__**'**__**t like decorating trees **_

The drunken Congressman Krusty knocked a bowl of latkes out of a man's hand while passing him on a pair of roller skates.

Krusty: _**And I don't like eating potato latkes **_

_**But I**__**'**__**ll give this lady**__**'**__**s melons a squeeze **_

Krusty skated passed a fruit stand and squeezed a couple of watermelons on the front. He cackled maniacally as he passed by and Frankie Foster, the shop keeper yelled after him angrily, "Hey! What have you got against the melons?!"

Janitor and the politicians: _**That**__**'**__**s just who we are!!**_

Fred Fredburger: _**Well, I**__**'**__**ll never spin a dreidel,**_

Janitor:_** But I**__**'**__**ll always throw an egg,**_

Fred ruined a dreidel game, much to a couple of kids' dismay. When they passed through a supermarket parking lot on their motorbike, Janitor snatched a couple of people's leg and much to his evil pleasure, saw his target. It was the nerdy JD, a doctor at Sacred Hearts hospital; Janitor's around the clock victim. Without second thought, Janitor pelted JD in the face with the egg, making the latter yell in shock and 'rub salt onto JD's wounds', Janitor took his wrench off of his belt and nailed it hard against the back of JD's leg. JD screamed in agony and fell over in pain, clutching onto his leg.

Janitor: _**And I**__**'**__**ll charley horse your leg for laughs!**_

Peter Griffin: _**While you**__**'**__**re singing your holiday tunes,**_

Vice President Peter Griffin rode a pair of skis into town and saw a group of singing Christmas carollers. He got a wicked idea and skid up in front of them, facing his back to the carollers.

Peter Griffin: _**We're acting like a bunch of buffoons.**_

The Vice President pulled down his pants and mooned huge white ass at the carollers, making them scream in horror and disgust. "Aaaaaagggh!!"

Peter Griffin: _**Whippin**__**'**__** out my big, white, scary moon**__,_

Laughing uproariously, Peter let out a huge fart onto the carollers, making them cough and wheeze. The fart itself even propelled the large fat guy down the street.

Peter Griffin: _**And blowin**__**'**__** a beef your way!**_

Meanwhile, Senator Yosemite Sam drove his land rover through the snow-covered forest still under the influence. Soon, he found himself passing by the Simpson family who were kneeling down in front of a group of grazing reindeer. Marge, Lisa and Maggie were enjoying themselves, while Homer and Bart were itching for some excitement. Yosemite looked at this grumpily and searched through a compartment in his car for something.

Yosemite Sam: _**I hate folks who think reindeer are cute **_

_**To me they**__**'**__**re just something to shoot **_

Yosemite Sam found the Smith and Wesson in his compartment and pointed it out of his open car window. _Bang! Bang! _He shot a couple of reindeers in their heads and/or necks, killing them instantly. Marge, Maggie and Lisa gasped horrified and glared at the Senator as he drove off. Homer and Bart on the other hand had achieved the excitement that had been hoping for and laughed out loud.

Janitor and the politicians: _**We hate love, we hate you...**_

JD pulled his face up from the snow and groaned as he wiped the snow and egg yolk from his face.

JD: (mopingly) _**I hate me.**_

Secretary of State Briand Griffin stumbled drunkenly through the suburban streets and noticed an open garage door he was walking by. Still laughing mindlessly and disorientedly, the white dog run into the open garage door and...

_Vroom!_

Brian sped out of the open garage door on a large green snowmobile, cheering and whistling all most insanely. He drove the snowmobile down the road back into town without very poor control of the vehicle.

Brian: _**Well, we're a bunch of snowmobile stealing,**_

'_**No **__**"'**__**tis-the-season-feelin**__**'"**__** kind of guys.**_

Brian shortly found himself driving his snowmobile alongside Janitor and President Fredburger on their motorbike, Peter Griffin on his skis, Krusty on his roller skates, Yosemite Sam in his car and so on. All together, the group looked like a motorcycle gang.

All: _**Kind of guys!! **_

They found themselves driving passed a row of houses, each with a snowman built on the front lawns. Janitor pulled out a pair of numchucks and whirled them around in the air, knocking each one down as he passed them.

All: _**This time of year sucks**_

_**So we take our numchucks**_

_**And make sure every snowman di-i-ies!**_

They drove passed an old yellow-skinned man with a white beard named Jasper and dressed in a cheap Santa Clause suit. He was standing next to a large pot for charity money and was ringing a bell in his hand.

President Fred Fredburger: _**Believin**__**'**__** in Santa**__**'**__**s all wrong,**_

He grabbed a hold of Jasper's beard and _**rrripp**__, _tore half of the beard off! Jasper screamed in pain as he ran around, waving his arms around in the air. **"AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!" **That beard was actually 100% real!

Krusty: _**And Chanukah**__**'**__**s eight nights too long.**_

The Janitor and drunken politicians dispersed once more around the city. By now, their drunkenness was now making them feel tired and many were now passing out in the streets or behind alleys.

Janitor: _**We hate love,**_

Politicians: _**We hate you,**_

JD screamed as he was ran over hard by Janitor and President Fredburger's motorbike!

JD: _**I hate MEEEEEEEE!!!**_

Janitor: _**We hate love, **_

Politicians: _**We hate you, **_

JD lay on the snowy road on his back in pain, especially after being hit by motorbike.

JD: _**I hate me...**_

* * *

Several hours later, dawn broke out over Toon City and while it was now Christmas Eve morn, some people were not feeling all that jolly...

_"Uggggh..." _

_"Oh, Jesus..."_

The Janitor and Fred Fredburger woke up in a dumpster bin, each feeling as if there was a rattle in their brains. Their clothes were filthy and roughed up and their joints were aching. The two had experienced one Hell of a rough night several hours ago.

Janitor pulled himself up and vomited out the side of the dumpster bin, "Ugggghh! Oh, God! Gaaaaagghh!!"

"Wow...what did we _do _last night?" Fred Fredburger sat up straight and rubbed his eyes. He heard a vibrating noise coming from his suit and the green elephant creature took out a mobile phone from the pocket. "Hello? Oh...hello, dear. Hello...yes. Yes, yes...yes, I know. I know that and I'm sorry I wasn't in last night. I...yes. Yes. I'm sorry, the party just got a little carried away.....I understand. I'll be back at the Blue House, right now. Okay, honey...okay. Okay, honey, I gotta go, I...I got some stuff to do. I gotta...yes. Yes, I love you too. Okay, good bye." He switched the mobile off and let out a long exasperated sigh. "Thanks for the party last night, Janitor. It was a Hell of a ride."

"No problem, Mr. Pres."

The President of Toontoria climbed out of the dumpster bin and down the alley, before turning back to him and saying, "I'll, ugh...I'll see you some time...whenever, ya know? Maybe uh....maybe we do something like this next year; wilder even."

"Sure thing. It'll be my honour, Mr. Pres." Janitor leaned back in the garbage of the dumpster bin, while the President made his way back to the Blue House. He felt himself resting on something hard; his wrench. He picked up and with a groan of irritation, tossed it away in some random direction.

_Clang!_

"Ow! My head...!" The voice of JD yelled out in pain.

The Janitor grinned evilly and put his hands behind his head, despite his hangover. "Yeah..."

* * *

**(A/N)** **And that will be all for this chapter. I just loved using the **_**'Davey's Song' **_**from the **_**Eight Crazy Nights**_** in this chapter, being that the latter film is a personal favourite film of mine. Adam Sandler is a comedic genius everyone. Also, I hope No Limit 5 liked the way I used one of his favourite characters, the mysterious Janitor from **_**Scrubs **_**as a main character in this chapter. Well, in the next chapter of December 24th, this author is going to take the famous Charles Dickens novel **_**A Christmas Carol **_**and shamelessly tear it down into my own twisted version. Until then, please Read and Review!**


	4. Chapter Three: December 24th

**(A/N) Seasons greetings everyone and welcome back to my annual Christmas story. In this chapter of the story, December 24th, a shall shamelessly tear down the famous Charles Dickens classic **_**A Christmas Carol **_**into my own twisted and adulterated version, starring everyone's favourite Kaleesh cyborg. So read on and enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter Three**

**December 24th**

It was December 24th, Christmas Eve, the day prior to _the _Yuletide holiday. Everyone in Toon City was full of festive joy and cheer as they made their final preparations for the big day. The rich were drinking merrily with the poor, the bullies were ice-skating with the nerds and the mall shoppers were still ripping each other to shreds. However, not everyone was filled with the same holiday cheer and warm tingling feeling inside. There were some Scrooges out there that just could not stand this time of year and seeing other people enjoying the festivities would get them even more repulsed.

In the Toontorian capital, the Toon City's own Scrooge was sitting in his CEO office right now at the company known as _Alpha. Alpha _was an industrial conglomerate in control of the making of everything from cigarettes to alcohol to lethal weapons. This man was coming up with his own way of feeling warm and tingly inside…

* * *

Inside the _Alpha _company head office, a tall Kaleesh alien was sitting down in a big black leather chair. The one thing that separated him from many of his kind was that he was half robot with white metal plating! The cyborg was hunched over and wore a cloak that was blue on the outside, and red on the inside. In this cloak were multiple lightsabers placed within the pockets. His name was Mr. Qymaen jai Grievous, the CEO of _Alpha _and former friend and member of the eight Toon City roommates.

Not only was Grievous a former friend and member of the eight roomies, but he was actually the one who helped them get their jobs at the local cinema, being the manager there himself. It would have seemed that Grievous and his former roommates would have been friends even up until that present Christmas Eve day, until one slow day a businessman came to the cinema. He saw how well Grievous organized the employees of the cinema and governed him like soldiers under his command. After some consideration, the businessman offered him a job at _Alpha. _The moment he was offered this well-paying job, Grievous showed his true colours. He quite his job at the cinema, abandoned his friends and left the apartment to live the rich life. A few years later, Grievous soon found himself as _Alpha _CEO. But ever since that fateful day he abandoned them, Grievous and the roommates had turned from friends to rivals, although they did tend to socialize now and then.

Grievous' office was coloured a gloomy dark grey and the walls were covered with calendars, pictures from newspapers, notice boards, etc. There was a long rectangular window going from one end to the other the wall opposite of the office door. A widescreen HD television was positioned on the wall opposite from Grievous' black wooden desk. The Kaleesh Cyborg was watching various Christmas television specials, while leaning back in the chair, smoking from a cigar and pouring himself a fancy alcoholic drink of his own brand.

"Bah." Grievous lifted his face mask slightly and drank from the _Alpha _brand gin. He swallowed it and shook his head in distaste as he lowered the face mask again. "This never does taste as good as the other brands of alcohol. Oh well, as long as it sells..."

_Beep!_

Grievous cringed at the sound of his intercom bleeping and pressed the red button on top of it. He spoke it slowly and irritably, _"Yes, Miss Bouvier?"_

A female and dull voice droned from the intercom, _"Mr. Grievous, we got a guy on the line wanting to talk to ya. Should I put him through?"  
_

"What's the loser's name?"

_"...Worm...Wormtail or something. I wasn't really listening that much."_

_'Wormtail96.' _Thought Grievous tiredly as he ran the mechanical fingers down the metal plating of his face. "All right. Put him through."

_Beep!_

Moments after that second beep, a different voice came from the intercom; a familiar British voice. _"Um, hello? Grievous? Are you there?"_

"Yes, Wormtail96." Grievous rested his mechanical elbows onto the desk and strummed his fingers against each other as he talked to his former roommate. "How might I assist you?"

Wormtail96's voice continued unsurely, _"Yes, well, I have been talking with the others a little about this. You see, we were wondering if it was possible that tomorrow you could...drop by the Koopa Towers." _He paused a bit before adding on, _"You know, have a few drinks, party a little with us and our visiting relatives?"_

"So in summary you want me to celebrate Christmas day with you." Grievous stated as he rolled his eyes a little at this proposition.

_"...yes, that's just about it. For old times sake?"_

Grievous pushed himself further back into his chair and placed his hands behind his neck. "Hmmm, the thing is I actually have plans to quickly drop by my parents' house. You know, celebrate a bit with the family. However..." He picked up his daily planner for the next day and scanned it over. "...I _do _have some free time tomorrow before I go to my folks' place. I _suppose _that maybe, just _maybe_ I could...pop by for...let's see...37 minutes, maximum."

Wormtail96 sounded overjoyed, _"Why thank you, Grievous! It is most appreciated!"_

"Ah, ah, ha." Grievous said sharply to his former roommate over the intercom. "Remember, I said _"maybe!"_ _"Maybe!" _I can't make any promises, since my planner can change in an instant. I'll just see what I can do."

_"Oh, of course. Well, we'll see you then...maybe." _

"Indeed."

Beep! With that the intercom switched off, ending the communication between the two cyborgs. Grievous let out a low groan and set his planner back down on his desk. He then checked his watch and got up walking out of his office. He decided it was time for him to address his workers, delivering them a quite important message.

* * *

On the munitions production floor of _Alpha, _a short way away from Grievous' office, the many overworked employees continued their non-stop labour without rest. Guns, shell bombs, tanks, you name it and they built it all for the Toontorian military. _Alpha _had been the biggest military supplier in the country for years now, making an enormous profit from it.

_"Attention workers! Attention!" _Grievous' voice boomed over the production floor loudly, catching the poor employees' attention. A podium with Grievous standing behind it raised high, casting a large shadow over them. _"This is an announcement to all you blue collar workers here at Alpha! Alcohol, tobacco, munitions, whatever. Pay attention!" _He cleared his half mechanical throat and spoke loudly to his many 'faceless' workers. _"As you all know, it is the Christmas season. The demand for our products if off the charts! Therefore, I am going to have to ask, no, scratch that....__**order **__you all, minus most of the white collars to work overtime this year, tomorrow included!"_

The crowds upon crowds of workers could not believe this! One of them, an overseer even spoke up loud enough for his boss to hear, "But Mr. Grievous, sir! What about our families?!"

_"Hey, I barely interact with my family more than twice a year!" _Grievous snapped down thunderously at his employees, terrifying the crap out of them._ "You don't see me all sappy about it, now do you?!"_

"But it's the Yuletide season, sir." An old employee limping around on a cane tried to plead with his boss. "A time of giving and...and family!"

Grievous merely snapped his fingers, causing an armed droid guard standing nearby on a catwalk to pull out its sniper rifle...

_Pang! Thud!_

"Well then..." Grievous said calmly, while strumming his mechanical fingers on the podium. He looked down at the horrified employees and continued with a still calm yet threatening tone, "...does anyone have anymore objections?" They all just shook their head, still stunned and terrified. "Good. Now..." The Kaleesh cyborg took in a deep breath and boomed into his microphone, _**"GET BACK TO WORK, YOU MINDLESS DRONES!!!" **_The employees did not need a second invite and got straight back to work, not wanting any more of them having their brains blown out. Grievous rolled his eyes and stepped down from the podium, saying to his many white collar Yes men as he passed them. "You guys get today and tomorrow off but for Pete's sake..." He glared down in disgust at the many tired employees working on the production floor. "And here I thought Santa Clause had a pretty lousy workforce..."

* * *

In the North Pole at Santa Clause's workshop, Saint Nick himself stood on a metal catwalk over the elf employees working on the hundreds of toys in the poorest of conditions. The fat man took out a megaphone and barked into it at the elves, _"Come on, you guys! We've only got a few days left to meet our quota for the year! Work faster!"_

An elf sat down on a stool, doing a poor job of sewing a teddy bear together and looked up at Santa, "We're trying, Mr. Clause! But it's a whole week we're trying to catch up by! And we're all working triple shifts as it is!"

"Ugh! Why did you guys let me do that? Having a whole week off to just drink and party! What was I on?!" Santa slapped his forehead in frustration and walked over to a door that said ''s office' on the front. "I mean God, my wife is gonna kill me if we don't meet this year's quota!" He opened the door and said to his elf employees one last time, "If anyone needs me, I'll be in my office!"

"Doing what?" A middle aged woman elf said as she took a cigarette out from her mouth. She was working at one of the conveyer belts, checking for any defaults. There were _a lot. _

Santa held up a pink front covered magazine titled _'XXX'. _"What do ya think?!" He stepped inside the office and shut it behind him hard.

* * *

That night, around 10:14pm, Mr. Grievous was about to be paid a very much unexpected visit...

Grievous stood in the parlor of his furnished yet very old mansion in a private residential area where a lot of the rich fat cats lived. He was very rich himself after all, being placed as high on the charts alongside rich dudes such as Charles Montgomery Burns and Donald Trump. The parlor was really dusty and aged, primarily because it was not like Grievous had anyone over to party or anything like that. He was a rich dude that liked to keep to himself most of the time.

The Kaleesh cyborg sat down at a seat and turned on the nearby television, generating the only light within the parlor. "Christmas..." He muttered under his breath with distain. "Just another bloody workday. Bah Humbug, I say!"

_"Griiiiiiiiiiiiiievousssssss.....!!!"_

In a shock from the ghostly disembodied voice, Grievous jumped up from his seat and looked around. "What the Hell?!"

_"Griiiiiiiiiiiiiievousssssss.....!!!"_

Soon, three translucent forms began to take shape in the fireplace which suddenly came to live in a roar of blue flame! The cyborg screamed in terror and hid behind a chair fearfully. Next the ghostly bodies in the roaring blue fire stepped out from the fireplace, all appearing to be mangled up in heavy chains. They were...

"Ed, Edd and Eddy?" Grievous poked his head out from behind the chair and looked at the three ghostly forms in chains.

_"Nooo!" _The ghostly figure resembling Eddy boomed loudly and mysteriously. _"We are spiritual messengers from...." _He cleared his throat and said in more of a normal voice and pointing upwards uneasily, "You know...the guy upstairs?"

The ghostly figure resembling Edd pointed out to Grievous, "You see, the reason we look like these 'Ed, Edd and Eddy' characters you speak of is because of this union rule we have. Messengers are to take the form of people the person being haunted knows."

"Okay...why?" Grievous asked, sounding more confused than before.

"Hey, you're speaking to the wrong guys about how our union works, buddy." The ghostly figure resembling Ed put his hands up and chuckled.

Grievous no longer looked fearful and he stood up from behind the chair, approaching the ghostly figures still with some caution. "So what...are you lot ghosts?"

"Well, yeah...pretty much." Shrugged 'Eddy' simply and shoved his hands into his pockets.

"But I don't believe in ghosts."

'Edd' frowned sternly and raised his index finger, proclaiming, "Well then..._maybe you will believe in this!!!" _The three ghosts made strange Kung Fu posses and....that was it. Nothing happened.

Grievous frowned sternly, "Believe in what? You're not doing anything."

"Yes we did. Yes we did." 'Ed' darted his eyes left and right, feeling a little unsure himself. "I mean...didn't we just disappear or something?"

"No."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really."

'Eddy' looked around his person and said confused, "That's weird. It's supposed to work, for God's sake!"

Grievous crossed his arms, saying clearly sarcastically, "I'm sure."

"It's really spooky, let me tell ya."

"Riiiiight."

'Edd' looked down at the chains mangling his body and frowned disappointedly. "Well this is just embarrassing. Not even these chains make up for it."

Now at the edge of his patience, Grievous snapped loudly and irritably, "Look! Are you lot here for any reason at all?!"

"Oh, yeah..." 'Ed' realised that he and his ghost companions had seriously gone off track and said in a now spooky and mysterious voice, _"Tonight, Grievous you shall be visited by three spirits who will force you to change your ways against your will!!"_

_"Whooooo wha ha ha ha ha!!!" _The three ghosts wailed as they did their best to look scary. All they really did was make themselves look like idiots.

"Are _you _the three spirits?"

The three ghosts stopped pretending to act scary and looked at the Kaleesh cyborg confused, "Huh?"

"Well you three are ghosts, another word for spirits." Grievous stated the obvious to the three figures. "And there are three of you here all ready."

'Eddy' rubbed the back of his own neck and said, "Uh, no, it's really one of those things _after _we've come. So...yeah, it's the next three."

Grievous put his mechanical hands together, saying at first politely, "Very well, then. Now do kindly..." He screamed loud enough to send the three ghosts flying backwards, _**"GET THE HELL OUT OF MY MANSION, YOU PATHETIC EXCUSES FOR PHANTOMS!!!" **_

"Okay, okay, okay. We're going. We're gone." 'Eddy' said hurriedly as he, 'Edd' and 'Ed' flew right back into the roaring blue fire. The three disappeared within the flames which died away immediately afterwards, leaving Grievous to continue seething angrily.

* * *

Later on that night, when Grievous had all ready tucked himself into his four poster bed for sleep, the first spirit arrived...

_"Griiiiiiiiiiievousssssss!! Waaaaake uuuuuup!!"_

Groaning and pushing away his bed sheets, Grievous sat up in his bed to see another ghostly figure floating in midair over him. It was one of the three spirits 'Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy' blathered on about, taking the form on none other than...Moe Szyslak?!

"Moe Szyslak?!"

_"Noooooo!" _'Moe' wailed again in a loose and ghostly voice. _"I am the Ghost of Christmas past!!!"_

Grievous frowned dryly, saying with tedium, "I all ready figured that, pal! I've seen more than one 'A Christmas Carol' television special over the years." He stood up one his metal feet on the bed and looked the spirit right in the face. "The reason I'm so shocked is why you've taken the form of Moe Szyslak. I mean, come on! He serves me drinks and all but I barely even _know _him, for God's sake!

_"I don't knooooooooow!"_

"Why are you talking like that?"

'Moe' just continued on, _"I'm heeeeere to show yoooooooou-"_

**"Stop talking like that!!" **Grievous yelled angrily, getting up close in 'Moe's' face.

"'Kay." 'Moe' said in a now normal voice and rubbed his own throat. "God, all that ghost voice stuff is no good for ya throat." He looked at the Kaleesh cyborg again and got to the point, "Anyway, look I'm here to show you what Christmas was like for little Grievous, many years ago. And you know what that means...."

Grievous rubbed his temples, groaning, "I hate flashbacks..."

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_A young and little precyborg Grievous sat down at the table with the rest of his family for Christmas dinner on the planet Kalee. By the well furnished look of the dining room, one could presume that Grievous' family were well off. Not necessarily in the fortune five hundred, but still pretty wealthy._

_"All right, everyone." A male Kalee who was probably Grievous' father. "Sit down. It's time for Christmas dinner. Let's just get it over with."_

_A female Kaleesh that seemed to be Grievous' mother sat a large silver platter down onto the table before the family. Lying on top of the platter, looking steaming hot was a large plump feather plucked alien bird. "Here ya go. This here bird had to be castrated before it was killed and cooked. It was the only way to get it all big and plump like this for dinner."_

_Little Grievous asked, sounding confused, "Why's that?"_

_"I'll tell you when you're older."_

_Grievous' father eyed the cooked bird curiously. "Hmmm...." Something about the bird looked off to him. "That's weird. This here bird looks very much lifelike. You know, as if it where still..."_

_**"Squawk! Squawk!" **__All of a sudden, the bird jumped onto it's feet and squawked furiously! It was obviously still alive!_

_**"What the fu-!"**_

_The alien bird leaped onto Grievous' father and began pecking away at him furiously. __**"AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!" **__The Kaleesh screamed in terror and jumped out of his seat as he tried to throw the mad bird off of him. Unfortunately, he found himself backing up too far to the open and... __**"Huh? Wuh! Agh! Agh! Oh, noooooooooooooooooo!" **_Grievous' father and the alien bird fell out the window, dropping six stories!

_**"Howard, noooooooo!!" **__Grievous' mother screamed in terror as her husband plummeted to the ground._

_Little Grievous cried upset from his chair, __**"Christmas is ruined!!"**_

**END FLASHBACK**

* * *

"There, ya see?"

Grievous however just crossed his arms and glared daggers at the spirit resembling Moe. "Okay, now what the Hell was that supposed to teach me?! All you did was replay the event of my father's death!"

'Moe' asked him sternly, "What? You have no idea?"

"No! Do you think you can give me the 411 or what?"

"I can't just tell you! You gotta figure that out on your own!" 'Moe' crossed his arms firmly and shook his head. "I mean, what would've been the point of that there flashback if I was just gonna tell ya anyway?!"

The Kaleesh cyborg's eye twitched and he said quickly and sharply. "Get out of my bedroom."

"Yeah, that's what _she _said!"

**"OUT!!!"**

* * *

Later on once again that night, the second spirit arrived on the scene...

"Greetings, Grievie." The spirit appeared next to Grievous' bed, the latter of which was hugging onto a money bag as he slept. This one resembled one person Grievous definitely did not like, even more than his former roommates. "I'm the ghost of Christmas present."

Grievous opened one of his eyes and let out a low painful moan at the form of this spirit. "Oh....just my luck! The spirit has taken the form of a pacman ghost reject!" He pulled himself out of bed and looked at the spirit repulsed. It indeed looked like a blue pacman ghost with eyes and a wide mouth. This spirit resembled none other than Blooregard Q. Kazoo.

"Yeah, yeah, sorry about that. The bosses said it would be an ironic gag since you hate this Bloo guy so much."

"Okay, now let's just get this over with." Grievous rested one mechanical leg on the other. "So come on; hit me with your best shot."

'Bloo' nodded and began waving his hands around mysteriously, "I shall show what Christmas was like for you _last year!!"_

Grievous looked at 'Bloo' befuddled and said, cutting the spirit off from his mystic mumbo jumbo, "Wait, wait, wait! Last year? Doesn't that come under the Past Ghost's jurisdiction?"

'Bloo' rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips, saying, "Dude, it's the nearest Christmas we got since this years' it yet to happen. I mean, we can't just wait around 'till morning! I've got Mr. Burns to visit after this. We just gotta work with what he have at the moment!"

"All right, let's not get so touchy about it! Jeez!"

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_It was Christmas 2007, last year at Alpha where Grievous was still in charge. At this time, the people of Toontoria were still celebrating the holidays merrily. All but the Kaleesh cyborg businessman, who was sitting behind his desk, writing forms, typing on his computer and doing boring...business stuff. That was just it. Work...and more, more work. The telephone rang and Grievous answered it._

_He listened to the person on the other end of the line and then said, "Okay, Steve, but I'm gonna need those forms in by tonight." He paused and then spoke again, "Okay, thanks." Grievous put the phone down and continued more with his work._

**END FLASHBACK**

* * *

"That's it?" Grievous asked 'Bloo' sounding angry and bewildered. "You woke up from my sleep _just _to show me that?!"

"Hey, you're the one who decided to waste his Christmas working and working and working some more. Jesus Christ, you are one boring Scrooge!" 'Bloo' looked at his wristwatch to check how much time he had left before having to move onto his next appointment. "Look, do you get the message of what I'm trying to show you here or what?"

Grievous tapped his mechanical fingers against the side of his metal plated head. "If I say 'yes', will it make you piss off?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

"Then yes. I understand completely. Now..." He grabbed 'Bloo' by the throat and yelled, **"HIT THE ROAD, SHRIMP!!"**

**CRASH!! **Grievous hurled the screaming 'Bloo' smashing through the bedroom window. The Kaleesh cyborg sighed aggravatedly and stomped back to his four poster bed to get some sleep again.

* * *

Later on (for a third time) that night, the third and final ghost arrived to show Grievous the true meaning of Christmas...

_"Griiiiiiiiiiiievous!!" _

Grievous got up from his bed to face the third and final ghost with little gusto. "Okay, this get this over with! This is getting serious old!" However, the Kaleesh cyborg was shock to see that standing in his room was...

"The Grim Reaper?" It was indeed the Grim Reaper standing there, leaning on his scythe in boredom. "What the Hell are you doing there?! You reap souls, not show people the Christmases yet to come!"

Grim took out a notepad and began scribbling things down as he said to Grievous, "Eh, I'm talking this up as a second job. Unfortunately, aside from the whole Mall incident, not a lot of people die at Christmas, so I need to pay the bills some how." He picked up his scythe and created a green glowing portal with it in midair. "Now look, I'm here to scare you into believing whatever the Hell I tell you, forcing you to drastically change your character at the last minute of the chapter of this story. Behold!" He motioned to the green glowing portal in which an image began to become visible to the two.

"Oh, that's a bunch of bull- **Agggggh!! Oh, my God!!" **However, Grievous let out a shrill shriek as he saw the horrific images in the green portal. What he saw was himself in an old folks' home!!!

_The very old Grievous' mechanical parts looked aged and rustic and his yellow reptilian eyes had turned nearly white. He also wore a blue scarf, glasses and a blanket covering his knees. The Kaleesh cyborg was sitting down in a rocking chair that creaked back and forth._

Grim explained sternly to Grievous as he looked into the green portal as well, "After so many years of hoarding wealth, you finally became so made from greed that you couldn't bare being parted from your cash! When you at last became so old to retire, you refused to spend it on moving to a place like Florida. Therefore, you ended up in one of those cheep retirement homes amongst Abe Simpson where your senility completely took over your mind."

"This is horrifying!!" Grievous placed his hands to his head as he watched the frightening images before him.

"You don't know the half of it, Môn!" Grim laughed uproariously and continued with flaming eyes. "Over this time, your so-called 'friends' like Burns and even your former roommates stole from your back account. All the while, you will be trapped in your own kooky world where you married your money, had sex with it and had ugly, _ugly _children together!!"

Grievous collapsed to his knees and hugged Grim's legs pleadingly, "Oh, Grim, please!! This can't be real! I won't let it be real! I'll change!! I swear to God, I will change!!"

"Whatever. I've done my job." Grim shrugged as he made the green portal disappear. "Catch ya in about, uh...eighty-six years, bucket head!" With that, the Grim Reaper disappeared into a burst of green flames, leaving a whimpering Grievous to curl up on the floor and suck his own thumb.

* * *

Finally, it was morning at 5:45am and Grievous slowly woke up, finding himself still sleeping on the floor. He got up with a jolt and looked around his bedroom, breathing and out rapidly. The Kaleesh cyborg saw a faint morning glow of light coming from his bedroom window, still smashed from when he tossed 'Bloo' out. Grievous ran up to it and pushed it open, causing a clump of snow to fall over his head, along with the snow all ready falling down. "Agh! Oh, for God's sake!" However, Grievous saw someone walking across his snow covered lawn. It was Blooregard Q. Kazoo, the real one and not a spirit taking on his appearance. "Hey, you down there! Bloo! Up here!"

"Huh? Bloo looked up at the Kaleesh cyborg confused. He was wearing a purple scarf and orange beanie hat. "What is it, Grievous?"

"What day is it?"

"Oh, it's just Halloween, nothing special or anything like that..." Bloo trailed off mumbling but then instantly frowned and yelled up at Grievous, "It's Christmas Day, you numb nuts! God, what are you? Stupid?!"

But Grievous was too overwhelmed with joy at hearing that it was the big day. "That's fantastic!" He then pointed in another direction out of the window, saying still cheerfully, "Now get the Hell off of my lawn before I release the hounds!" Grievous recoiled back into his bedroom and shut the smashes window. Bloo just gulped nervously and ran away from Grievous' premises at full speed.

* * *

An hour or so later at _Alpha, _Grievous made a surprising announcement to the many workers he had forced to come into work that morning...

Grievous stood in his same podium over the working blue collar employees on the munitions production floor. He spoke into the microphone to his employees solemnly with his mechanical hands behind his back, _"Attention, everyone. Attention." _The employees stopped their labour intensive work and looked up at their boss. "_This is an announcement to all you blue collar workers here at Alpha! Alcohol, tobacco, munitions, whatever." _He cleared his throat, closed his eyes and said to his employees in an apologetic manner, _I have an apology to make everyone. It was wrong of me to force you all to come into work this Christmas morning."_

The many blue collared workers were shocked at what they had just heard from their tight-fisted old boss. He was actually apologizing for them coming into work for him to make some money that they barely even got a portion of?!

"Sir, do you really mean that?!" The overseer from the other day asked his boss incredulously.

_"Yes, I do."_ But all of a sudden, Grievous' expression turned wicked and he added harshly, _"So instead, I have decided to make total layoffs of everyone working on this production floor! All of you are fired!" _He stepped down from his podium and added quickly before walking through the door that had the word 'EXIT' on the front, "Ta, ta! Oh...and Merry Christmas! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!!"

_Slam! _The Kaleesh cyborg slammed the door shut, leaving the employees to just stand there with utterly shocked and crestfallen looks on their faces!

* * *

**(A/N) And that ends my hilarious spoof of 'A Christmas Carol' and the Christmas Eve chapter! Next chapter, December 25th will of course be the last chapter of this Christmas special in which family, friends and roommates celebrate the day in the apartment. Until then, Read and Review!**


	5. Epilogue: December 25th

**(A/N) Seasons greetings everyone and welcome back to the epilogue of my annual Christmas story. In this concluding chapter of the festive story, the Toon City roommates shall have friends and family over to celebrate the big day. So read on and enjoy.**

* * *

**Epilogue**

**December 25th**

It was the day. _The _big day. December 25th, or better yet known as Christmas Day. Children woke up with glee to open their many gifts with great anticipation and adults kicked back and relaxed, a cup of hot chocolate held within their hands. Carollers sang their hearts out merrily and drunks stumbled around town, arms linked as they cheered tipsily like idiots.

7:45am at the _Koopa Towers _and the front door of the roommates' opened. Wormtail96 stood there, looking very merry and welcomed the person at the door cheerfully, "Why it is you! Qymaen Grievous! Merry Christmas!!"

Grievous stood there in the open doorway, dressed up his blue and red cape, a black top hat and a red scarf, looking pretty jolly himself. He was holding a large silver platter and on top was a _gorgeous _Christmas turkey which let out a hot steam. "Yes, well....Merry Christmas to you too, Mr. Wormtail96. I, um..." He held the turkey on the platter up to Wormtail96's view. "Brought you lot this little something." Grievous decided it best not to tell Wormtail96 or anyone else about what had happened to him the previous night. If he did, some people might think he had gone coo-coo over the last week.

Wormtail96 took the platter holding the turkey gratefully and said, "My goodness! Thank you, Qymaen! I'm telling you, we only had two turkeys for us and our guests. This will do perfectly. Come on in, good friend." The cyborg wizard led the Kaleesh cyborg into the apartment, while asking him, "So did you cook this over night or something?"

"Nah, I actually got in about half an hour ago."

"Really?! How on Earth did you get a fully cooked Christmas turkey in such short notice, especially on Christmas Day?!"

Grievous closed the front door of the apartment shut as he said somewhat slyly, "Ah, I've got quite a few good resources, my worm-tailed friend..."

* * *

About half an hour ago, Grievous was walking down a sidewalk through the falling snow of Toon City, heading for the _Koopa Towers. _Up ahead he saw a man happily strolling down the sidewalk and in his hand on a silver platter was the same gorgeous cooked turkey. The Kaleesh cyborg narrowed his eyes and ducked behind an alleyway dumpster, secretly waiting for the man to pass by.

The man holding the cooked turkey walked passed the alleyway while he whistled a Christmas tune at the same time. However, unknownst to him a pair of reptilian eyes were watching him dangerously, _"Oh, Christmas Day! Oh, Christmas Day! Oh, Christmas day has-!"_

_**Vhirscht!!!**_

_**"Aaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!"**_

* * *

Back in the apartment at _Koopa Towers, _Wormtail96 and Grievous walked into the decorated living room where the dining table had been set up for dinner later that day. Bender, Creepie, No Limit 5, Yin, Yang, Jack Spicer and Zim were there, celebrating the day, be it opening presents, drinking or eating. Also in the apartment were all the guests, mainly family and friends that the roommates had invited over. There were millions of bugs that consisted of Creepie's family, Wormtail96's father and mother, No Limit 5's cousin Mystery, Yin and Yang's Woo Foo master named Yo, Jack's enemies and occasional friends the Xiaolin warriors, the two Irken rulers of Zim's home world known as the Tallests and Bender's friends from New New York known as the _Planet Express _crew. In fact, there were even more than that; including the Pete Express crew, JD, the latter's doctor mentor Dr. Cox, Moe Szyslak and Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy. The list was all most endless.

"Hey, everybody! Grievous is here!" Wormtail96 spoke into a microphone to make him heard amongst the crowd of guests, who just muttered incoherently at this announcement. "Yesss, well I will just warm this up in the oven then." He walked into the kitchen on that part to do as he said.

Meanwhile, back in the living room, Yin and Yang handed Bender their Christmas present to him. "Here ya go, Bender!" It was covered in red wrapping paper that had green Christmas trees on it and was bottle shaped.

Bender took the gift, smirking as he said sarcastically, "Wow, I just wonder what this could be..." He tore off the wrapping and the gift, to Bender's surprise turned out not to be a bottle of alcohol at all. It was instead a book titled _'Dealing With Being An Alcoholic'. _He paused for a brief moment before saying, "...oh."

Over at the stereo with the Xiaolin gang, NL and Mystery, the evil boy genius Jack Spicer was dancing in a goofy manner to _Axel F. _"Oh, yeah! Watch these moves, ladies! Go Jack! It's ya birthday! It's ya birthday!" He then landed on his head and began spinning around it. "Oooooooooooooooooooooooooh, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaah!!"

_Pow!!_

Jack toppled over onto his back, wrapping his arms around his aching stomach where Mystery had slugged him. NL let out a whistle, saying to his cousin in a very grateful manner, _"Thank you!"_

Over by the sofa, Creepie sat down lazily by herself and drinking from a glass of eggnog. Zim was watching her in secret from behind the tree and walked around it, sitting down quietly next to her. For a few minutes, there was only silence between the two, the only noise being Creepie gulping down her eggnog. After he was tired of waiting, Zim let out a pretend cough, "Ehem!" No response. _"Ehem!" _Once again, mere silence. **"EHEM!!"**

"Here." Creepie handed her Irken roommate a small green bottle.

"What's this?" Zim eyed the small green bottle in his hand suspiciously.

"Cough medicine." Explained Creepie dryly as she looked down at her glass of nog. "You sound bad."

Zim rolled his eyes and got to the point, putting the cough medicine down. "No, Creepie, I was just trying to get your attention." He then held up something that made Creepie's eyes widen. It was a mistletoe. "By my study of Earth culture, I have discovered that it is tradition for those under this, uh...toemistle to be forced to kiss each other."

"...what?!"

"You shall follow tradition!" Zim exclaimed loudly, holding the mistletoe over their heads. "Now I demand a kiss, right now!"

Creepie was about to protest some more until she got a wicked idea, making her grin secretly. "Okay, sure. Just close your eyes and get ready." Zim did as he was told and closed his eyes. "I'll give you a kiss you'll never forget."

_'All right lips, man your stations!' _Zim thought to himself as he readies himself. _"This is not a drill! I repeat, NOT a drill!"_

_**Slam! Hisssssss!!**_

**"Aaaaggggghhhh!!!" **Zim screamed as a burning pain surged throughout his face from a hot iron being slammed against his face! "Oh! Oh my God! Oh God! Oh God! Oh God! Creepie smiled simply, hopped off the sofa and walked off to rejoin with her family, leaving Zim to roll around on the floor screaming in agony.

Zim stopped wriggling in pain on the floor and looked up at the Tallests standing before him. "So Tallests...how are you liking the party?"

Tallest Red and Tallest Purple just shrugged, saying simultaneously, "Eh, it's all right." Zim smiled at this meagre show of approval before he proceeded to continue in his display of agonizing pain.

* * *

Later on that day, everyone sat down at the dining table and getting ready for Christmas dinner. It was quite a tight squeeze, but they all managed to find a seat. It was indeed quite a good dinner that Christmas; the vegetables were well steamed, the wine and champagne were cold and lived up to their expensive cost. However, there was this one little matter that arose when it came to the turkey...

**"Squawk!! Squaaaaawwwk!!" **The now revealed to be alive turkey jumped up onto the table and began attacking Bender and Wormtail96, screaming wildly like a banshee.

"Oh, Christ! Get this thing off of me!" Bender yelled, trying to push the crazed bird off of him.

"I'm trying, Bender! I'm trying!" Wormtail96 picked up a metal poll and began hitting it against the turkey, yet it did not stop in its tracks. "Why won't this goddamn bird _die _all ready?!"

Grievous was now experiencing a severe cause of childhood trauma at this point. "It's happening all over again!!!" He took out a brown paper back and began breath into it and out. "Dad...why did you go like that, Dad?!"

"Allow me." NL pulled something out from under the table. It was a flamethrower. "Hey, Turkey!" The bird looked back at the teenager superhero with a confused gobble. "Say hi to Satan for me, fowl!" He activated the flamethrower, burning the screaming turkey to a crisp!! "Ha, ha, ha, ha!"

Once NL turned the flamethrower off, Dr. Zoidberg expected the burnt bird curiously and nudged it with the tip of his claw. "Hmmmm..." He snipped of a piece of the charred turkey and at it quickly, while still savouring the taste. "Well, Zoidberg must admit it does still retain most of its flavour."

The Janitor tapped the lobster alien on the shoulder, making the latter turn around to face the near demonic maintenance worker. "Yeah, uh, one question, Dr. Jerkberg..." Janitor asked him sternly, crossing his arms. "...do you, of all the biggest and well...ugliest of all the losers in this city even have an invitation for this here party?"

"An invitation?"

Dr. Cox stepped forward with his hands in his white coat pockets and telling Zoidberg as sternly as the Janitor, "Yeah, you know, some sort of physical message saying you are specifically welcomed to drop by for a party OR otherwise a verbal message saying your are welcome. If one does _not _have an invitation, they are therefore not welcome to come to this said party." He came up close into Zoidberg's face in a manner of intimidation. "That brings us to the very question in the first place...do you or do you _not _have an invitation for this party?"

".........no."

* * *

**BOOT!!!**

The front door of the apartment was kicked open and a screaming lobster alien found himself booted right out of it. Pete poked his head out the open doorway and yelled after him in mock cheer, "Have a holly jolly one, Jerkberg!" He tossed a wreath out at the lobster alien and slammed the door hard, leaving Zoidberg outside to groan.

* * *

Later on, when night began to settle down on Toon City, there was one main event left on the Christmas Day agenda. It was Wormtail96's favourite highlight of the joyous day, while for everyone else it was the longest and most annoying; Christmas carolling. Wormtail96 had scheduled with Mayor Daffy Duck that he and his group would go up on a stage in the city centre in front of the giant Christmas tree to sing before the many passing citizens. It was normally a pleasant and enjoyable time of the Christmas day for Toon City, except for one little recurring problem...

_**We wish you a Merry Christmas; **_

_**  
We wish you a Merry Christmas; **_

_**  
We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!  
**_

**"No! No and NO!!" **Wormtail96 stopped his metal foot hard on the stage several times. The cyborg wizard was obviously the conductor of the group, being that he was holding onto a conductor stick and stood before a small podium. He glared at his roommates and guests (minus Grievous, whom had left earlier to visit his family) whom of which were the ones actually singing and scolded them, "You lot were completely off-key! I mean what is so difficult with singing the song flawlessly each and every time!"

"Wormtail! You could not even conduct a sand people choir, let alone a group of carollers!" The disgruntled old witch who was Wormtail96's mother snapped at him from the third level on the stage amongst the others. She looked all most identical to her cyborg son, except for the fact that her trench coat was pink, her turtleneck was yellow, her scarf was blue and orange, her eyes were pitch-blue and she had no worm-like tail.

"Mum, there is no need to bring that up around my friends!"

Wormtail96's mother crossed her mechanical arms and huffed, "Oh, so _now _you have friends, do you?! I find that hard to believe, young man!"

The cyborg wizard rolled his eyes and looked back at the small crowd of citizens that were watching the event and told them exasperatedly, "Sorry about this, everyone. It's not every Christmas that someone has to conduct a bunch of boobs. So just bare with us." At that remark, the other roommates and the guests looked at each other and smirked, a wicked idea coming to their minds. Wormtail96 turned back to his group of carollers and said, "Okay, this time, let's try and do 'Jingle Bells'. How about that?" They all nodded and cleared their throats, getting ready to sing. "And a one and a two and one, two, three! Go!"

_**Jingle Bells,**_

_**Batman Smells,**_

_**Robin Laid an Egg!**_

_**The Batmobile Lost a Wheel,**_

_**And the Joker got away! Hey!**_

Wormtail96 tossed his conductor stick onto this podium and snapped at the point of berserk, "Okay! That's it! You guys are just screwing around with me now, aren't you?!"

Bender's pal, Philip J. Fry shrugged and said to the cyborg wizard, trying to get him to come around, "Aw, come on, Wormtail! We're just having a little fun. That's what Christmas is kind of about, isn't it?"

"There is having fun and then there is acting like buffoons!" Wormtail96 picked up his conductor stick and pointed it at Fry sternly. "I mean come on now! I've really been looking forward to this event all Christmas. The least you lot could do is just gather some decency and kindness to sing a couple of songs!"

Mystery frowned and threw her arms up into the air, "And Wormy, I understand that completely. But carols just get dull and boring! Can't we sing something a bit more general, just with a Christmas theme to it instead?"

Wormtail96 thought this over and sighed, finally giving up and realising that there was no use in continuing with carols. "Well, maybe a few around the year songs wouldn't be bad. Okay..." He looked at them and asked, "So what songs would you like to sing?"

"Pinball wizard!!" Fry yelled loudly.

"Nah." Bender frowned, waving his hand slightly.

JD called out, putting his hands around his mouth to make himself heard louder, "Never Gonna Give You Up!"

"Oh, God! NO!"

Master Yo snapped his fingers at getting a new idea and said, "I know! How about 'Wake Me Up Before You Go Go!'"

Everyone, including the crowd watching cheered at that idea. It seemed that that song was unanimous Wormtail96 shrugged; tossing away his conductor his tick and took out a remote, clicking it in the direction of a stereo. A Christmas version of the said music began to play and the cyborg wizard took out a microphone, addressing the now cheering and expanding crowd of citizens, _"Everyone, here is some of Jitterbugging WHAM music for ya!"_

All: _**I wanna**_ _**Jitterbug!**_

They snapped their fingers.

_**Jitterbug!**_

They snapped their fingers again

_**I wanna Jitterbug!**_

Again with the finger snapping.

_**Jitterbug!**_

Bender jumped onto the front of stage, grabbed Wormtail96's microphone and obnoxiously began singing in front of the crowd.

Bender: _**You put the boom-boom into my heart**_

Wormtail96 put his arm around his robot friend and began singing with him.

Wormtail96:_** You send my soul sky high when your lovin' starts!**_

The crowd had now grown even bigger that all most everyone in the city was there. It looked like a whole goddamn rock concert by a first glance. Even President Fred Fredburger was there, cheering for his favourite song with Peter and Brian.

All:_** Jitterbug!**_

No Limit 5 jumped up in between Peter and Brian and three clinked glasses of nog together.

No Limit 5, Peter and Brian: _**Into my braaaaaaaaaaiiiin!**_

Yin and Yang had climbed up atop of the Christmas tree in the city centre and waved to the crowd below. Winking to each other smugly, the two each 'cannon balled' down to the crowd below, the latter catching the two and sending them into a crowd surf.

Yin and Yang:_** Goes a bang-bang-bang 'til my feet do the same!! **_

Over by a set of benches in front of the stage where the rest were singing, Creepie was sitting down boredly and drinking a cup of hot coco. She enjoying some alone time until a certain green Irken jumped on top of the bench in front of here, freaking the bug girl out. Zim held up the same mistletoe again and winked at her, making Creepie scowl hard.

Zim: _**But something's bugging you**_

_**Something ain't right**_

_**My best friend told me what you did last night!**_

Creepie took off the lid from her coco cup and simply tossed it right in the Irken's face. Zim screamed loudly in pain and fell off the bench, rolling around in the snow as he covered his burning face. Creepie climbed on top of the bench and made it her turn to sing.

Creepie: _**Left me sleepin' in my bed**_

_**I was dreaming, but I should have been with you instead!**_

Back on top of the stage, Jack Spicer was hovering over the flooring with hover bot with the Xiaolin warriors dancing behind him. Jack did a few lame dance moves in midair and even began juggling with a few pokeballs he sto-found! That's right...found.

Jack Spicer and Xiaolin warriors: _**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**Don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo**_

_**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**I don't want to miss it when you hit that high!**_

No Limit 5 and Mystery scooped up a couple of snowballs and began tossing them at each other. Mystery lugged all three of her projectiles at her cousin at the same time, only for latter to dodge each one with ease. Once he had done so, NL looked up at laughed at his cousin, "Ha! Is that your best-?!" _Pow! _A fourth snowball struck the teen superhero in the face before he got the chance to finish. He wiped it off, looking really confused at how that fourth snowball was possible.

NL: _**Wake me up before you go-go**_

Mystery: _**'Cause I'm not plannin' on going solo!**_

NL: _**Wake me up before you go-go**_

Mystery: _**Take me dancing tonight!**_

Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy picked up an electric guitar, a keyboard and a drum set in that order and began singing in goofy Elvis uniforms. All though the three were enjoying their shining moments on the stage, the crowd watching booed loudly and ruthlessly

Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy: _**I wanna hit that high! (yeah, yeah)**_

President Fred Fredburger stood up in his open car and gave all passers by the peace sign like a certain American President. Peter and Brian Griffin sat by him and began tossing out what seemed like confetti onto the open crowd.

President Fred Fredburger: _**You take the grey skies out of my way,**_

_**You make the sun shine brighter than Doris Day!**_

However, after Vice President and Secretary of State had finished tossing out the 'confetti', the people in the crowd began itching and fidgeting uncomfortably. Peter held up the bag before the people which read in green, _'Itching Powder'. _The people in the crowd gasped and toppled over, frantically scratching their unbearably itching bodies.

Peter: _**Turned a bright spark into a flame**_

Brian: _**My beats per minute never been the same!**_

Back on stage, Yumi made her way up onto the stage and sat down near her favourite cyborg wizard. She was wearing a light purple version of a female Santa getup and yanked Wormtail96 down next to her. The latter really did not feel comfortable at that moment, being that he had very poor skills at being the boyfriend type.

Wormtail96: _**'Cause you're my lady, I'm your fool!**_

_**It makes me crazy when you act so cruel!**_

Yumi pulled Wormtail96 up and began forcing him into a mockery of a ballroom dance. It may have looked romantic to the citizens watching the couple up on stage but that was because they did not see Yumi holding an icepick dangerously close to the wizard's back. "Wow..." Wormtail96 remarked uneasily as Yumi forced him to dance with her in a strong grip. "You're strong."

Yumi: _**Come on, baby, let's not fight**_

_**We'll go dancing, everything will be all right!**_

Back amongst the crowd, a nervous JD found a certain near demonic Janitor approaching him. He gulped and covered himself in self-protection until he saw something held before him. JD opened his eyes to see a glass of eggnog held before him by the Janitor. The maintenance worker shrugged to the doctor, saying simply, "What? Hey, even a guy like me can be nice at the holidays."

"Oh...all right, then." JD took the glass and cautiously drank it. He smiled; it actually tasted very good. "Wow, this is great." JD's smile faded when he heard and felt a rumbling in his stomach. "This...this has laxatives in it, doesn't it?"

"Yeah, it does."

"Uh-huh...excuse me." JD calmly with a rigid face turned around and made his quickly to the nearest porta potty, making the Janitor laugh loudly. "Hey, Moe! Pass me a _Duff." _The bartender obliged and the two each opened their bottles which both fizzed at the top.

Janitor and Moe: _**Wake me up before you go-go **_

_**Don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo!**_

_**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**I don't want to miss it when you hit that high!**_

Bender and Jack Spicer were now playing hacky sack with the bending unit's head. The two were enjoying it, despite Bender's head getting painfully kicked around continuously. Unfortunately, Jack kicked a little too hard, sending Bender's head up into the air and landing somewhere in the crowd.

"Oh! Oh this is just 'perfect!' This is just 'great!'" Bender's head's voice yelled sarcastically as he was tossed around randomly throughout the crowd.

Bender: _**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**'Cause I'm not plannin'' on going solo!**_

Jack Spicer: _**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**Take me dancing tonight!**_

Bender and Jack Spicer: _**I wanna hit that high (yeah, yeah, baby)**_

All: _**Jitterbug!**_

_**Jitterbug!**_

Zim, Creepie, Yin and Yang locked their arms and began doing a can-can dancing before the cheering audience. Zim held the mistletoe up over him and Creepie for a third time now, making the bug girl sock him quick in the face. His jaw still hurting, Zim turned to Yin and held the mistletoe over him and her. This resulted in not Yin socking the Irken in the face, but Yang giving him a well-deserved punch in the gut.

Zim: _**Cuddle up, baby, move in tight**_

Creepie: _**We'll go dancing tomorrow night!**_

Yin: _**It's cold out there, but it's warm in bed**_

Yang: _**They can dance, we'll stay home instead!**_

Arriving up on a sleigh with a goofy Santa suit, Mayor Daffy Duck cheered and waved before the audience. "Ho Ho Ho! Merry..." He looked behind at one of his goons that were pushing the sleigh forward. _"Line?"_

_"Christmas, sir."_

Daffy looked back at the audience and finished, "...Christmas!"

Mayor Daffy: _**Jitterbug!**_

Now the citizens were a buzz with joy and Christmas spirit, despite the song they were dancing too was barely Christmas related (all though, it did have somewhat of a Christmas tune to it). Pete had an idea and soon began setting up fireworks around the edge of the stage.

Everybody in the city: _**Wake me up before you go-go **_

_**Don't leave me hanging on like a yo-yo!**_

_**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**I don't want to miss it when you hit that high!**_

_**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**'Cause I'm not plannin' on going solo!**_

Pete lit a match and then lit a fuse on the fireworks. The large fat cat businessman took cover in the snow, getting ready for the big bang!

_**Wake me up before you go-go**_

_**Take me dancing tonight!**_

_**Wake me up before you go-go, don't you dare to leave me hanging on like a yo-yo!**_

_**Take me dancing!**_

The fireworks set off and soared into the air, leaving sparkling trails behind them. They then exploded up high in the sky, leaving various coloured patterns and images behind. One left most noticeably was the red image that read 'Merry Christmas!' The audience cheered and clapped for the eight roommates and their carolling group. Bowing appreciatively before their audience, the eight roommates waved happily as roses and real confetti were tossed to them.

Suddenly, spoiling the moment entirely, Dr. Zoidberg slid down across the stage on his knees, singing the actual end to the song. _**"Boom-boom-boom!!" **_Instead of receiving applause, all poor Dr. Zoidberg got was harsh glares from the audience and the eight roommates, "...what? What did I do?"

* * *

Later on as it midnight neared, the eight roommates were standing in their apartment, looking at you the readers as settling Christmas music played in the background.

Wormtail96 spoke up first with his hands behind his back, "From all of us here in Toon City…

"...we wish you Christmas joy." Creepie continued with what actually seemed to be a smile.

No Limit 5 gave the readers a thumbs up. "May all your wishes now come true...

The mechanical spider legs coming from Zim's pack back lowered him down onto the floor. "...for every girl and boy."

Jack Spicer crossed his arms and nodded to you readers. "We hope your holidays are filled with fun and cheer!"

Yin and Yang smiled and spoke simultaneously, "So have a Merry Christmas and…"

_"And a happy…ugggh!" _An obviously hangover suffering Bender groaned with a slurred and low voice. The Bending unit's legs gave up and he collapsed hard onto the floor. The eight roommates just stared at his unconscious body blankly.

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**The End**

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**(A/N) And that ends that Christmas special everyone and just in time for the holiday itself. Also, I thank you all for taking time to read this story and supporting it as well. I hope you all have yourselves a peaceful holiday and as the old saying goes...Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!**


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